today is my first day of work at Spinelli!
and i realise i seriously want a massage machines at home...
i have aching back and legs after standing for 6 hours,washing and scraping things...

haha, i am not complaining! just voicing out.hee. =P
but the good thing is i get to sample alot lot of drinks today and I blended drinks today for customers!=D of course there are some errors that i made....hee.

what can i do with my mind when i am doing things that don't really requires a lot of thinking?
hm.

While I was surfing through facebook,blogs..looking through what people have wrote,how they have expressed themselves. I felt this sadness.

Everyone is trying to be somebody, trying to find something or trying to do something to cause people to look up to them.

They could be doing it consciously or sub-consciously.

I think i find myself among this people.

I attempted to shove this feeling aside, not to give much thought to it and try to occupy myself by finding jobs online.

I was listening to this Christian Radio online and suddenly I paused and listened attentively to the lyrics of the song.

The next thing I know,the song answer the uncertainties and doubts that I was having.

how amazing!

Every Man

by Casting Crowns

I'm the man with all I've ever wanted

All the toys and playing games

I am the one who pours your coffee, corner booth each Saturday

I am your daughter's favorite teacher

I am the leader of the band

I sit behind you in the bleachers

I am every man

I'm the coach of every winning team and still a loser in my mind

I am the soldier in the airport facing giants one more time

I am the woman shamed and haunted by the cry of unborn life

I'm every broken man, nervous child, lonely wife

Is there hope for every man

A solid place where we can stand

In this dry and weary land

Is there hope for every man

Is there love that never dies

Is there peace in troubled times

Someone help me understand

Is there hope for every man

Seems there's just so many roads to travel, it's hard to tell where they will lead

My life is scarred and my dreams unraveled

Now I'm scared to take the leap

If I could find someone to follow who knows my pain and feels the weight

The uncertainty of my tomorrow, the guilt and pain of yesterday

There is hope for every man

A solid place where we can standIn this dry and weary land

There is hope for every man

There is Love that never dies

There is peace in troubled times

Will we help them understand?

Jesus is hope for every man

I hope this song will speak to you too. =)

It's all about people.





It's about engaging Young People's lives


It'a about loving them with a genuine love.





So hard!


It requires one to putting down of oneself, to look only at their interests and not your interest.


It requires sincerity to really want to know them.





still learning.


always learning never learnt.





although it's so scary that there is really so so much things to learn ,


I'm very thankful to God for each small little parts that I learnt,


Because He is the One that allow me to see and learnt. =)

Pei Mei. Gloria. Hui Yun.

engaging young people's lives.

been buzzing about uni application the whole day today.
type and re-type essays.
thank you BJ for vetting my essay, trying to cut and cut so that it fits the 300 words max criteria.

for a moment i thought i have completed both essays for both uni,
HOWEVER!
i realise i saw something wrongly : i saw the word limit for NUS as 2000 words, but the actual fact is 2000 CHARACTERS !!!!

but thank God that sis was home today. just her coming home.
so with my sweetest voice i asked her to help me.
and my sis is raelly superb , from 3000 over characters she manage to help me squeeze to less than 2000 characters. =D
and she spent an hour to help me.
im so touched and happy! =D

i guess what i need from her is just quality time, which i believe is the root of my friction with her recently.
at least now we smiled =)


tmr is the dead line and there are supporting documents waiting to be send to the admission office.
plus the appraisal form.

ahyoi,so scary yet so exciting.
i guess the excitment comes from i really wonder where God will place me. =)

okie, im on a super high mood now because now is like 1 am plus plus and im here reporting to you that i need to sleep. goodnight!

hopefully i can hurry settle my uni stuffs and get back to work. i need to hurry catch up with my work!

P.S. i shall blog about my mission trip to thai soon~ =P

"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me."



On the altar,every single thing has to be surrendered.

my sms inbox has been rather full since yesterday, so i decided i shall post them to really thank you for all your words of encouragements and comforts... =)

You funny ah, say sorry for what! Yes, you're in God's hands don't worry.He sure has a plan for you!Just trust and seek Him:) besides,grades aren't the purposes y we're on earth.meet up soon soon k. I wanna send grace present. --- eunice

Hmm u ok? Any plans then?
All rite, will keep u in my prayers sis.May the Lord keep u and give u peace=) --- Zhongjie

Hey... no need say sorry to me...u feel ok can liao --- Enci

Why did u say sorry.. Hmm ok glad to hear tt u're fine(: hmm my line's always available if u need anyone to talk to ok --- Keren

take care ok? u need to find someone to talk to can find me.. --- Shuzkx

Oic. Don't have to be sry la. =) --- WeiEn

Yep.It's ok. Just stay positive and trust in Him. *hugs**smiles* =) --- Qingyu

:)its okay to be disappointed though..Take cares then..message if anything..---Yurong

Yep you're well and safe in God's hands no matter the tide.Don't worry there are still options open out there for you and me.Can i call you tonight when you're more settled or you are free to talk now? --- tricia

Trust in Him.Don't give up. :-) cu tomorrow. --- Dora

Ok...At least u have e courage to face up to reality...Haha..That's great... :-) ---Weiling

Ok...Trust that God is still very well in control of e situation...Continue 2 trust and depend on Him 4 e way ahead k... ---Bev

I didn't dare ask how you did!Heh.But i guess it's alright then if you are so optimistic:)take care, we'll meet soon!
Mm,keep your options open!:)Physio is a good route to take too, i have a contact in there if you need to talk.well done for passing gp!!! ---Leann

Dear Christa,may God's grace comfort u this time ya.Will keep you in prayer sister.Take care:-) --- Peiling

Wan Xian, must jiayou k Yuen Kay's here for you!Anything just give me a call.Still love you no matter wat you are always the best the most hardworking in my heart. --- Kay

Hey sister...Have a good cry today n stand strong 2mor onwards...For the Lord will bless u in watever u do if u continue to have faith in Him...He will provide ur future route...Jeremiah 33:3"'Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know"---Sze Ean

Hey, how're you feeling? R you ok? do you need to talk? ---weiying

Hey christa,glad that u r trusting God.Rest assure that God knows wats best.*hugs* ---michelle

hi christa! today's a bright n sunny day. Are u taking in the beauty n joy of creation..?=) i found this beautiful verse during QT."I lift up my eyes to the hills- where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." will pray 4 u to haf wisdom in choosing course! --- chun long

Hey wanny,just want to encourage u that its alright, u tried ur best.If u need any advice regarding uni,feel free to call me k.God has a wonderful plans for your life,and this includes ur A level results, He always knows whats the best for you.Faith faith faith is what u need k :) --- Jojo

these sms are really sweet (that's why it's in pink!) and precious to me. Through all these love and concern i received from you guys, i know God really love me lots! that's why i have so many so many little angels around me...thankx for you guys who made a personal call to me too, it must have been scary to call...haha..=)

ok,i can clear lots of space from inbox now. =)

some issues that i have to face:
when expectations ( from myself and others) are not met...
values of the world VS values of God.
Glorifying God means......
steps of Faith.

today im supposed to lead bible study during Youth group. but im feeling quite lousy that i really don't feel like leading. But somehow God reminded me that i can't because im feeling lousy then anyhow teach or lower my standard abit?So i obeyed and after the eaching, i felt this joy in me that truly once again assured me that im serving a God that is faithful and He is a true almighty God. and im very much comforted.

Thank God whose love for me does not varies. =)

just had bible study on 1 timothy chapter 4.
the idea of Godliness is really very very hard to achieve.
just from the time i came home from bible study till now, i could already point out many ungodliness sides in me. =(
but Godliness is something that we as Christians must labour and strive towards.
It is a must!
Godliness is not something that is impossible to work towards because God has said in 2 Peter 1:3 "seeing that His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. "

urgh. i guess one key for myself is also to recongnise the value of Godliness.
If i do not see it , there's really no more in working towards it..............

suddenly there's question that pop up to me : am i really appreciative of what i have strive towards in the past few months? years?

when you felt that you are being loved,
don't just stop there.
Think further.
who is this source of love?

Remember Christ. =)

yippppeeee ! thank God that dad and mum allows me to go church mission trip to ChiangRai! =D

okieee, im really looking forward to 2 upcoming mission trips =D =D =D

**Right Attitude

I thank God because there are lots of people around me who loves Him lots too. =)

sherlyn said that gloria has influence me in a sense to smile more and have a happy face, haha..well, it's true to a certain extent that gloria has make me smile more often( cause she is so lame and causing me to be cranky! hahaha..=D) but i know the more important reason is cause of God' love and grace that He had choose to let me see many new things in His perspective... =)

while listening and sharing,this thing is always concluded in my mind that is :
all man has sinned and fall short of God's glory.
broken communications.
broken relationships.
broken hearts.

drawing back to the idea that only God can ...



Purpose.People.Principle.
Attitude.Skill.Knowledge.
Heart.Will.Mind.

my prayer for today is to ask God to help me come to a full understanding to what i have heard,what i have read and what i have seen.

HEY! i just realised that i have hitted 100 post and this is my 101th post! haha..anyway i gotta share with you what i have learnt from yesterday session and today's consolidation...=)

2 things that i took away with me
1) God is the source of wisdom.
so if you lack of wisdom, there's only 1 choice that is ask Him! =P
to choose otherwise , then the source can only be either from youself or the devil.
it is so obvious that the right thing, the smart thing to do is to ask God but so often i also find myself being a fool,choosing otherwise. >.<
Moreover, God says He will give generously.
" The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom"

2) God can intercept.
We always have many plans in our mind and heart,especially at least for me now i can have bigger plans for myself ...like what job i want..okie, if i want this job i cna try to apply this scholarship..this course...then confirm can have stable income...etc.
but i am again like a fool cux how i know i can live for another day?
i like how the speaker put across..."are we holding our plans lightly?" well, we ought to hold it lightly to a certain degree cux if we hold our plans too tight, we are not allowing God to be in the picture.
but we may swing to another degree that is we do not plan and just say just wait and see how God will lead me...well, God has given as a mind and a will so we ought to excercise it..
so for me, i will still do my planning but with a prayerful heart saying"if it is God's will,let it be" [not just a tagline but is said with a sincere heart] ,recongnising that God is ultimately the Soverign One, He is in control. =)

is so easy to swing from one extreme to the other...
may I consistenly ask God for wisdom.... =)

the moon has been shinning really bright for the past few days...
the skies are clear and i can see more than a handful of stars...
i like the moonlight that shines through my windows and my bedroom floor...

just strolling home slowly under the bright moon light is really nice...
just enjoy the quietness, enjoy the moments that i can utter a few words of prayers and sing some songs to my dear Heavenly Father...
enjoy the moments of solitude before my Heavenly Father.

i guess the busyness of life, the fustrations,the sadness etc. in life should really push us to take time to be quiet in front of God.

today i learnt that God is love. He is truly love. only a trinity God is love.
when you say you love, there must be an object.
So if it is a non-trinitarian God, he can't be love because it doesn't make sense that he love himself.that's not love. there can be another possible object that is man himself. if it is this way then we can only say that God has love. He is not love.
Therefore, our God not only has love , He is love! this statment is valid ! cux He is a trinitarian God.
I hope i put it across rather clearly and there's no contradictions =P

God has continue to shower His love to me through many ways.
like i have a circle of friends around me whom i can learn from how to live out my life that truly counts for Him. like i can have a good exposure to His Word and Work etc etc.
knowing that i don't deserve all these in the first place but now cux of His grace, i enjoy all these things ... so really i must and want to love people like how God has loved me. =)

where there is pains and sufferings , teach me how to sow love.

Hi ! I'm back in one piece from ProjectServe Camp. I have really enjoyed myself in the camp. I enjoyed the stretching of my physical limits ( walking kilo after kilos of distance, night cycling! PT in the morning). I have really enjoyed the sharing of Word, the sharing between project servants. But truly more than just enjoying , i hope i will remember what i have learnt and apply it for a life time.

Being a christian, is all about a life of
1) Service
2) Sharing of Gospel
3) Sufferings
4) Sacrifice

there's so much things to work on this year. On top of striving towards holiness, i must remember Jesus Christ. He's the reason behind of the things that im doing and going to do. How much and how far i will grow this year, is truly by His grace. =)

Triumph and struggles.
A level result?
Hm.

ProjectServe officially starts tomorrow! i have to report at 8.30am tomorrow! okie, first rule to myself : no complaints!=P

wheee......im going away for ProjectServe camp in ard 8 hrs time? =P

well, i just want to jot some thoughts down before i officially start my year.

I'm gona delcare now that the year 2008 is going to be another year of grace and mercy ! just like how 2007 was. =)

of course there are uncertainties ahead just like 2007, perhaps more ...since i have to face my A level result...but I must be assured that just like how God have walked through with me 19 years of my life, He is going to walk through every seasons with me this year again! hehee..

i did plan some new year resolutions... i didn't list down too much so that it is stays rather realistic.hahaha.

1) improve on my prayer life.

2) don't let the doubts (regarding the Word) remain unanswered.

3) control my temper towards my family

4) show more effort in remembering my friends'birthday!

5) learnt how to touch the heart of people ( okie, this is rather general, but i dunno how to phrase it more specific =P)

6) continue to improve my english (& chi too)!!!

7) train my ears (in terms of music skills)

P.S. whoever read this, please help me along too k? =P

yup! Before i press on for the coming year, when i look back the year of 2007,there are really lots of things to thank God for. I really thank God for the people that He have put ard me...they are really like angels, helping,guiding and protecting me. =D etc.

there's lots of things that i wana say but i need to turn in now. cux i need to store lots and lots of energy for the camp. goodnight!

my 2 lovely friends :gracy and eunice =D

It is PROM NIGHT today!

im not very excited actually because not all of my friends are going.
haha, but after doing so many thing for this day, i can now feel the excitment! teeheee....

list of things that i have done and i have to do

1) bought my little black dress at Robinson
2) trim eyebrown at Brauhouse
3) found and bought matching accessoriess at Chomel
4) found matching clutch and heels
5) done with mannicure and peddicure at Goodearth

6) having hairdo at Zoom today
7) learning to do make up myself with the girls today!

ahahaha..sound exciting ya? ahaha..yup im happy! but the manni that i did yesterday is not perfect anymore! i got some chip off...how sad lah.

ooo..another happy things is yesterday i went to watch an Wang Li Hong 's outdoor concert! haha, we got free tickets from her aunt's friend's daughter (what along connection right). And he was really humourous and cute, there is no wonder why my friend likes him so much. I tried to use my hp to take pix of him , unfortunately!, despite that im rather close to him , what i captured was just a figure of "white ghost" because of the strong lightings. well but nevertheless i still enjoyed myselfi. oh i think wang li hong got see me face to face leh! ahahahaha...silly me..

and i had a good sleep yesterday night (finally) i was having a few sleepless night due to STRESS! yesterday i was suppose to lead my very first lesson during youth group and because of this lesson i have prepared really hard and worry lots that is why i cant sleep and eat well. Haha , although i told myself not to worry too much cux God is there for me , but i still worried. Oh well, got some feedback and they it was rather okay, but i don't really feel it's ok. Hm, but truly, i wana thank God that i wasn't too nervous that i can't utter and also thank God that some people have gained some things through this lesson =)
oh perhaps the aprt that i can't eat well have done me good,perhaps i will look slimmer today..haha, silly me again. please DO NOT try to starve yourself so that you can look slimmer. =P

oh! it is12pm now! im gona meet my dear dear xin ying in 1hr and 40mins time..now gona pack my room a bit, pack some cosmetics stuff, prepare my bag, have a good thourgh bath!
i think im gona be late...ohno....=P

I feel so happy to have friends who speak the Truth to me.

thankie Euniceeee! =D

A LEVEL IS OVER !!!!!!!!!!!

haha...but i don't really feel exceptionally happy or relieved.

whY?maybe it was because the physics mcq today was quite bad. but actually i know the real reasons behind it. I know what's the challenges ahead for me which left me feeling rather scared.

well, that's a side note.

let me tell you how my friends and i celebrated. cathy,mic,pek,zihui and i went to sing K BOX ! and watched a very nice movie - STARDUST. We sang our hearts and lungs out(is this the way to phrase it?) , with pek trying to imitate and say funny dialouges...it's really funny =P

Stardust is a nice movie! it has suspense, surprise,humour and action pact elements. It's nice!

then went to eat dinner with pek,take MRT home with her..

haha..such a normal outing..but it's considered our last outing! so i feel abit sad..because i will miss those times that we mug together...crap together...get high together.. feel like slapping and boxing each toerh(not literally), hooking their arms and walk home together....i will miss them!!!

ok i shall stop here,im getting tired, wana turn in now..gdnight! =)

may i learn how to share people's emtion bagagges but at the same time lay all of it in the hands of the Almighty.

im feeling random now so im gona blog randomly...

mummy is cleaning our house windows now..it's so scary to see her standing on the chair,wiping the windows..as you know i live on the 20th storey! what if she suddenly..such thoughts always freak me out...but when i asked mummy "aren't you scared?" she gave me a reply that shows that she is really not afraid at all...and i can't help but feeling wow, hoping that i can being more brave like my mum..not afraid of heights...(ok this sounds really trivial....)

ok exam news: 2 more papers left before "freedom" arrives...haha..i like how lily put it across...soon 'you will smell the freedom coming'. haha..the upcoming papers are MCQ papers! haha..it's a much more relax paper...BUT! still im still mugging for it..i didn't slack! haha....i seriously need to score like 39/40 ... cux the previous papers that i have done...are really weird....the questions are weird....=S ok, i shall not be bothered how i will score..and truly learn how to lay it in God's hands...

well, though it is exam period now...but there are lots of different thoughts lingering in my mind..ok one part of it is the after exams plans...but another part of it..is thoughts about..hm, human behaviours?
sometimes im really angry about myself for not being able to articultae my thoughts clear enough....or form logical links between the thoughts that i have in mind.... but well, what i can say is...whenever i see someone in great anger or harbouring great hatred towards someone or hear accounts from my friends on what's happening in their family...i just feel so sad...and perhaps...scared. sigh, i think the scariest thing on earth is really human being himself....
hopefully as i continue to think about what's on my mind..i will have a bibical perceptive and a heart that is not bitter...

ok...im not gona end this post with an emo note. it's 2pm now...it's time for lunch! yeah! do you know why i eat my lunch so late? because i want to eat that stall's porridge and yam cake and zhu chang fen...and that stall only starts serving at 2pm...yeah.ok! time to eat and study...

gracy is coming back to SG! eunice is ending her exam soon too!im gona have great fun this holiday! =D

ok..im dying to blog but i don't know where my computer takes super long to load blogger....=S

im so SIANZ now..seriously...i feel so unmotivated to study! despite that i have pasted my " DREAM LIST" (list of things that i want to do after my As!) on my cardboard ..i still feel so unmotivated........ahhhh...how! i have not much time left before my next paper!

Hm, perhaps ...it has been too long since i last excercised...moreover there's so many things that i can snack at home...haha...that's why im feeling so piggy and lazy at home.....so i don't feel like studying!

Haha...ok lah, stop whining girl...i must get back studying despite that i don't feel like it! >.<

yeah..ok im gona cook my own dinner now and tidy up my house and wait for daddy to come back home from China!

Yox ~ now is like around 17days after prelims? and around less than 45 days to A levels?
it is really scary when you start couting the number of days you have left with...
ok, my prelim was not very well done, my overall grade is pronounces like this: Eesss.
doesn't it sounds like eeks?

ok, i do feel eeks but thanks for by dear friends encouragements which reminded me to trust in Him.
I feel eeks because my dream of 3As is like quite impossible? not only do i feel eeks, but i also feel worried. But why worry? As we often say exams is not our everything!
But of course, this worried feelings can do you good too. It is suppose to give you some pressure so that you can be pushed. It is not supposed to make you feel lousey and you drop all the way to the bottom of the pit.

When i pray abouy my studies, i always asked God what should be attitude when i study? It is always easy to say: study for God's glory. However, it is always so hard to actualise it.
Well, not to worry.I guess as i continue to grow older(both physically,mentally and spiritually) i will have better glimpse of what does it mean to study for His glory.

For now, this is how i am going to remind myself. ( this final conclusion is formed through various encouragements that i got from my friends: jojo,tricia,lily,kay,alo etc.=D)

when i attempt questions, attempt it with my best efforts.i cannot think that i got second chance to redo it.just do whatever i can, and let God to the rest.(ok this last part sounds cliche but i must acknowledge that God is in control.=) REMEMBER : GOD PROVIDES.

Some key verses(it is always good to use bible verses, as God's promises lasts forever=D) to remind myself :

1 Corinthians 3:6
6I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow.

Romans 5:3-5
3Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

Romans 8:28
28And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.


thank God for the joy He has given me. =)