yox. yup. has been really busy preparing exam.everyday is like a rollar coaster to me . suddenly happy . suddenly stress. suddenly sad.haha .. after e conversation i decided to jot down some reflection during this period of time. =)

yup. no doubt this period is really really stressing .
i tot to myself. how come im feeling so stressed?
the most truthful ans: im scared of retaining. i have high possiblity of retaining after obtaining 3Fs in terms. haha. i scared how ppl think of me. i dun wana let ppl thinks im stupid or incapable.
therefore i begin to pressure myself..then of course got breakdown loh.
but i realli thank God for showering His grace and mercry to me.
He reminded me that hey where am i placing my confidence? in my results in my studies?
since i really doing my very best, always trying to maximise my time in studying the results i should raelli leave it in His hands who promised me that His plans are to prosper me.
perhaps i really retain , but i did my best. though to the world this may seems not a prosperity but hey His thought are far much greater than my thoughts. His plan definately works for a good purpose! =P

im so happy that I have this hope in me, which i really wana tell lots of ppl..when i see people stress and all that i really dunno how to encourage them , cux there's nothing to hope for..i can onli say just do ur best ... but for those who has the Hope in Him , when we do our best we can be assured that our results are safe in His hands.

one more thing to add, i always condem myself when i cant do the qn .. dermorilsing myself... i realise that im uniquely created by the very very wise and smart Creator ! so..i definately have the potentail to conqueor the qn !!! haha ... but CANNOT BE PROUD !remember..all these things does not come from me but from our Creator =D

well well..let's really learn to put our faith and trust in Him.I have tasted His goodness and faithfulness in this difficult times ... go !taste His goodness urself! =P

sitting infront of the comp.really unwilling to face what i had to study.ahhhhh.jiuming ah.
my chest has been pain since 7..and i really wonder why.now is 8.what if i studdenly get a heart attack .. ahh! that will be good! that means i will no need to face promo !
it's only tues ! and im on my verge of giving up?! how can !!! i wonder what i will be like at the end of this week...*sobx*
waha...bahhh bahh...i want a good health ! no headache. dun wana feeel feverish when i get panick... ahh..
haha..i think i continue to write like this my sept enties will be really sad ...so depressing to see the word STRESSED ..so let's read it this way ! DESSERTS !!! YUMMY :D:D:D
yar ! physics is a piece of cake ! coated with purple berries with creams ... maths is just a slice of mango mousse ! chinese ?! my ice-kachang ! hahaha... if i really eat all these i will really get terrible tummy ache ..the weathr is so cold ! haha..nice to sleep eh? but cannot !
ok let's get cracking ! dun be lazy people !!!

come do with me : BREATHE IN --- HOLD it !1 ...2....3....!! :D
BREATHE OUT !
again!do this three times ! feel cool? ok !

in these times of difficulties i will be obedient and leant to trust God for He will provide me with His strength ! ;P
"so do not fear,for I am with you;do not be dismayed,for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you;I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

yox.let's blog blog blog. to relieve stress ! haha...
im doing my tutorial on curve sketching..and im so impatient with drawing curves !! u must consider the curve tends to where and where .. ahyoi caculate until i blur!*-.-*

and i have been eating mooncakes ! i just cant imagine the amts of fats ! hahaha ...im gona lose my title of ms fit ! hahaa ! these year i got to eat a variety of mooncakes...haha..

1) my sis's future mother-in-law's 1st attempt of making mooncakes herself. and she can be really creative...bin pi + green tea + choc chip..and how it taste like ? ahem. shan't comment...but well..seems that im fuflling my sis responsiblity ..ate 6 out of 12 !!and she ? none !
2)haagen daz ice-cream mooncake..of course yummy..but is a bit too sweet...guess how much one haagen daz mooncake cost ? $20 !!! still got
3)various hotel mooncakes ...
4)yam mooncake..one of my favourties..and
5)my father's fav. hainan mooncake..and wu ren mooncake..which wat he like is what i dislike the most.. eeewww...
see! the amt of mooncakes i got to eat...= fats !! haha...ok dun get me wrong. im not on a diet.just that i have to eat healthily to prevent any more growth horizontally.haha =P

ok. let's move on to the next topic. which is what my father teased me about yesterday ->hooking a Jin Gui Xu ( a golden tortise husband!)
if he is serious about it im gona bang my head against the wall now!haha!
haha. let me delcare.why i never wana tok about the possiblities of a bgr relationship now.
1)im not mature enough to hold the responsibilites as a helper for my partner
2) no time to be committed. doing phy can take me 24 hrs. where got time for bf ?!!!
3)my age is very far away from the suitable marriage age !!
4) there are far too many more impt things that getting a bf !!!
5)...can't think liao ...but im sure these reasons are sufficient=P bleah.

what's the point of just getting a relationship after the another? sometimes is really sad to see my friends getting hurt over and over again. sad.
let me grow more mature first lah..use the time to really develop myself. =D
whuever see this dun ask me this qn ANYMORE! =P wahahahaha
let me at least be a nerd for now. go study ! =D=D=D

well. one more lesson that i learnt as this week come to an end that is : slow to anger!!
"for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires". James 1:20

this verse never speaks so strongly to me before.this shows that God is really all-knowing. He knows that i have been VERY short-tempered this week. well the week is coming to an end. since i confessed my sin. let is be the past and let's look forward to a good coming week !=P
let's move it ! i wana finish my maths ! =D
whuever feels that i spoke very harsh to .im sorry!

yox.yeah i know i just said i wun blog for a period of time. but i wana say it out! or else it will remain "undigested" in my mind. haha. i think so.
"huh.u come school for wat?"
"very stupid loh. come school for wat?"

let me explaine the background of this : i only got 1 period of PE lesson today out of 5 periods of lesson.because.JC1 lesson will ends at 11.10am today. and after that is 5-6hrs of long NE trip to OCS(officer cadate school).12 people turn up out of 26.some are going to take pink slip and zhao after their important lesson.

well. heard lots of such comments. no im not hurt or anything. just that i tot to myself. i really look that stupid meh? obviously not ! i know. well. is not a matter of stupid or not.it is a test of my faith.=)We always sing we want to live our life for Him and blab... but when decision comes , it is really tough. of course i really wish not to come school. but think again.what's my dentity?ans: daughter of the King of kings.my life belongs to who?who i wana live for?ans: The Almighty Father. therefore i have to be accountable of the time given to me. and coming to school is my responsibility as a student.

well. a test of my faith. no doubt. this decision i made.will defintely sharpens me.
so im happy person again !! =D=D=D
ok.my thought are digested.no constipation.wahahaha! =D

my blog is going to be lonely for a period of time ... wana load up pix but it will take me time .cant afford.
the past week has been terrible. I had been a bad time-keeper. Therefore this week...it cannot be !!! so ... i must be really conscious of how i spent my time !

Do pray for me that through this time of preparation of exam i will learnt to draw my strength from Him, stay focus but of course not to forget to continue to read His Word and do His work. =P

*to peeps who are having prelim : jiayou too ! =P

woah ! i have visitors who are coming to my blog! haha... =D im happy!hehee..hello ! all are welcome! haha ... my blog is not anyhow anyhow can see one loh ...cux i dun anyhow anyhow tell people one loh...haha! =D

well.. after a one week of junk food for my braekfast lunch and dinner!!! which are mostly high in sugar, salt, fats..they are oily fried and full of msg ... FINALLY ! i got to eat home food for today...finally!!! haha ... i have fish veggi and toufu .. with saba chilli .. home-made chilli..yummy! haha...the fish has no perservatives...simply washed with salt and steam...veggi .. is with little oil no salt ....toufu is fried at the outer skin onli ..the inner is still as white as before...yummy! i finally got a healthy meal ...haha ...! =D

well.it's nice to get to talk to zel and alo today over lunch and get to know them a bit more .. =P i hardly dine in with them ... =D well ...ohyar ! toking about the collection of our harp gown ...my mother was laughing like mad at me loh!!! haha..she say i simply dun have any figure in it..and im look really short in it ..!! ahh ! jiu ming ah! =P

yeah. pa is coming back home today..however some miscommunication ...two cars are went changi and wait for him ... that means one party is dissapointed and angry. and who kana? me loh.... ahyoi ..suppose to be happy that pa will be home today..what did he bring back leh? =P

>i only do 3 question of phy for the past few hours!!!
>> i don't wan to waste my holidays!!!
>>>ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!>.<

today 's air is really bad ... very bad .. serious air pollution .. i cant even stand to brethe in the air for a sec today .. everywhere is "burning" .. =(

i was tagged as ms fit today ... i have no idea where this idea come to her... which i wana delcare to her..im not fit!...hahahahahaha ... i just insulted my very ownself...haha....im just conscious of health without carrying it out...which is so bad lah....body combat on friday was no use at all i didn't even sweat...!!

let's slp ! then i will be pretty! hahaha...for tomolo performance by the youth! wohoooooo ..buai!

as i look at my blog. my english is still very bad! poor grammer poor vocab.poor sentence structure.everything is poor! ah! got to start reading my TIMES that are lying everywhere.hee!

today im so touched by a testimonial given by a mother not only about herself but a testimonial of her daughter and son too.

And also the daughter and her co-labourer shared about their mission trip in June to yun nan , once again reminded me the great commission.not that i dunno about the great commision ..but through it i see the weakness in me .there's 2 type of stuff . one for an eternal cause and one that is not. many times i placed importance and hold on to things that is so small compared to things that is for an eternal cause. for example , spending of my time. is it most of my time is not used wisely? when actually the time i can use it to do something that is more meaningful?

why sould i hold on to it since i koe i should give up and accpet the 'no' answer and placed my time on the more imporatnt stuffs that will last for an eternal cause?

and the bible did show the imporatnace of a family. the testimony showed the bond between the family memembers. they love each other with the love of our Father and i really think is a very admirable thing to actually grow together spiritually. isnt it nice to spend time and pray together with our family members?

i think the essence of a relationship ,no matter is family friends or a life-time parthner , is not just have fun together , but to help one another in the spiritual walk with Him " spur one another " encourage and speaks to one another in love .. growing up together spiritaully is a very beautiful thing... =)

did u watch superstar?! i think it is really nice . well. happy that weilian won . however i feel a pinch of sadness in me ... im wondering is it a good thing for him to step into showbix? well..is not for me to worry... hmm

anyway tried to change my blogskin ..i realise it took so much time decided to give up instead...haha..

tomolo is body combat! well time to burn my fats off! eating lots of junk recently..THAT'S BAD!!

happy teacher's day ! and happy birthday to my dear frend ah wen ! =D

*yawnx*
i always think if i just make sure that i eat vegetabes and fruits everyday , my health should be quite alright . ok plus excercise . i do excercise ok. =P twice a week?
but im wrong! true enough as what my father always nags about ... no materr how well is ur diet the most important factor to your health is your sleeping hours!
yeah...got headaches...doze off during class...urhg. seems that by just "ta-hanning" is cannot ..is harms my health... so ..to be wise...i better force myself to complete everything before 12-1230am.
let's move it! i wana finish my EoM! horrible! doing it for the third time!

-lonely without daddy-
no one to make me milo every morning
no one to help me spread my bread with nutella and snow cream
no one there to ensure my saftey by watching me walk to the mrt ...and lots more..

it's funny to see mummy trying to play the role of my dad ... they are just two completely different people. haha. what happens if one day.........

yox! i wanna make some noise here ..my blog has been rather lonely .. that's cause im lazy ... i does have my weird thoughts lingering around .. but haha ..yup.lazy =P

im searching for new blogskins...saw some nice one .. shall change soon .. =P

well what's my thought for today??
hm. just wanna say woman wanna be feel very blessed.haha.
suddenly i realise there are so many people are willing to help me!
maybe is not suddenly.hm.and i realise there are many people who can help me in my physics.
what can i say? Jehovah Jireh, always providing my needs. =)

therefore HEY EVERYONE! just wanna say a simple THANK YOU !! i think everyone who i come to know has helped me one way of another!=D=D=D

woosh! wah!>.<
i observed somthing recently too ..
the person u care and love deeply can make u turn to a monster...i mean a crazy monster ..haha
i observed how my dear sis turned crazy because of diff people ... woah.now i know it is powerful

tell u a secret .. i dozed off for a few sec during chapel ! my goodness..that makes my guilty =S
well..seek for forgiveness!ok time to sleep!

> trying to squeeze every single drop of brain juice everyday .. so that it can work more and more efficently as the days go by...=P

>>u cant place ur emotion needs or ur security in man , cause man will definately fail u.yet it is so hard to not to tend to do it.well.it is not something that u can conquer by yourself.rather with God's help.acknowledge it.then continue to surrender ur life unto Him.=)

song that we sang today that i cannot not agree:

Chorus:
how could i live without you
how could i survive without your love
without your touch
you are the one that heals me and cleanes my heart
and set me free.

truly without Him , i dunno how can i survive through my darkest moments? without the love of Him that He has shown by sending His only son to die for me,how can my sin be cleansed nor can i be set free? His truth has set me free.=)

haha .. let me note down my currect greatest achievement that is ..... i finally opened my mouth and book a date down to meet my phy teacher ! (opps! i suppose to ban the word!) hehee.... finally..u shld had seen me beaming with joy and hop a little while walking out sch...haha..i hope no one noticed...haha...it takes super big courage for me to take that step..waha !

u koe wat? i think cool breeze is so nice...especially the breeze after a rain ... when u take a deep breathe is smell sweet and refreshing .. i like that kind of weather best ! =D just sit somehwere in a corner...drink a cup of ...hmm...coffee? stare at the sky .. look at the moving clouds ... read a little .. i think i will feel very contended le. =)

soon ? such days will come? hehee...

my___ practical is still undone.

hello.. have not been posting any entries lately ... i do have weird tots in mind wanted to post up ... but haaha...but im just too tired and lazy ..i think sleep definately has a much higher piority than blog..haha

i don't feel good today..didn't have a good sleep yesterday..my mind was pratically awake just that my eyelids are close ... throat is still very itchy which im scared that it will turn into running nose and finally leads to fever ... i seriously dun want to fall sick .. that's why im feeding myself with lots of fruits...=P and i was quite annoyed during chapel .. by people's comments .. i feel like just scolding them lah..but ... haha... i have no right too ...hehee...

i wonder why people like to say vulgarities? is it really something cool? something in?fasionable? i really can stand people saying the 4 letter words like no one business ... i feel like yelling at them!

haha..my entry sounds mad today ...haha...ok..i better calm down and step aback ...breathe in breathe out...1..2..3.!smile! haha..=D

u only gona live everyday once u koe ... haha..i find it really hard to live everyday for God's glory...just the controlling of emotions alone ...kills me...haha..

today i received a BIG D ..not initial D movie tix or vcd...haha...is a comment that marks : POOR SKILL D ...wahahaha...tomolo is phy prac !!! i seriously dunno how to comment and annalyse on errors loh...haha..

let me share with u a nice song sent by the woo, (waha u better tell me what's ur blog add!)
Who am I
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my nameWould care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning StarWould choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You're

Chorus:I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours
I am Yours

yar..who am i men..that the Lord of all the heavens and earth will want to shower His love and grace each day for me? what rights do i have to argue and be stubborn ... be submissive!=D I belongs to Him , He will be my shield, help me counter all the attacks..i shall fear nothing!wahaa...do u have such a powerful weapon in ur life? ;)

it is great to be on par with time =D
it is bad to be behind of time =(
why am i always chasing after time?
why time just cant be on my side?

ah! man is small man is limited.just too bad.face it.
ah! but that's not the excuse.
to continue to be accountable for the time u spent. bleah =P

all sorts of things are pilling up higher and higher
it seems like it gona crash down on me any moment ..
but let me not stop running .. continue to perserver..

I know He is with me , He has continuously letting me to taste His goodness!
sustaining me through...=)

i only hope that what i have on hand can be truly accounted for...

"Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness , and all these things will be added unto you"

tired? feel like giving up too ? don't k ... cause u are not alone facing such situation ...moreoever we got a BIG GOD above ! =D

hello..just sat formy physics test...yar i was panic ..very...that it takes about half of the duration tof the paper for me to cool down..that's alot...ok..didn complete the paper as usual .. and .. im not very optimistic about passing this test ...

haha..i realise something i had been talking about physics all day ! hello! that's not the way loh...my life is not about physics!! aha..im gona ban myself from talking about physics ...

let's talk about holistic eduacation ...haha ..acutally im thankful that im exposed to all sorts of area in ac..yar...spors music and accademic ... stretched ..truly..=P ok that is quite out of point ...

i love fridays ...helps me to catch my breathe .. =P anyway yar...everyone is talking about promos ...haha 6-8 weeks more?

i like today devotion too ...he shared about this big big banner that write"God is on our side whom shall we be afraid ?"

step back and think again if two methodist school happens to compete with each other and each put up this banner as a moral support for their own school....does that maen that God will stand only at one side of the people ...

but God is constant how is it possible for him to be bias? so he ended with we should say "we are on God's side ( standing firm at his side of righteouness) whom shall i be afriad?"

=P being educated in a methodist school ...somethimes we use versse without much thinking and it become misused...so i must be really careful in what i say..=) make sure what i say has depth and meaning..boohoohooo! =D

ok... i feel rather guilty of screaming at my sis just now .. didn't control my anger well enough..was trying to crack my head on that phy Qn and she just provoke me at really a wrong time ...well....hmm..

physics has a detrimental efffect on me ? haha .. well... a scoope ice-cream did cheer me up instantly...waha...the invention of ice-cream is brilliant! haha =P

yup going back school tomorrow ....i guess everyone hopes that holidays will be even longer right?

I think now the greatest challenge for me is to really discipline myself and use my extra free periods wisely ... not just stoning around in sch..

haha...guess what i succeded in not giving in to snacks today !!! what an accomplishment ..the night is young time to sleep ..then tomolo can wohooohooo...in school!!=P

hey mr physics...im gona win you over !! >.<

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
quite a familiar verse ya? but God's Word is always relevent , it stills minister to me. =D

yox is anyone missing my blog entries? aha ... i rather miss the leisure of typing in entries .. seriously is hard for me to blog .. cause once im online i will talk non stop by the time i know it will be late midnight ... ahaha .. so therefor i concluded i have been guai recently..=P

actually not very true .. my "hobby" now is sleeping .... but cant sleep now cause the ice mocha is too effective ... haha..but i appreciated that cup of ice mocha..!!=D and i have lots of indigested food ... cux i ate my dinner at 12am! imust say is supper...haha ..

i enjoyed today ... national day ...my first time of spending it with the woo and her friend d ?haha ..i dunno how to spell her name...paisae! ran and ran... just to catch the glimpse of the fireworks ...haha...ohwell ...yar..we did but not the full view is blocked by that "durian" =P i enjoyed the best part of the day is really just sat at the cafe with them ..and at the skygarden playing guitar and singing songs that praise our Father in Heaven... so nice and peaceful ... haha ...how i wish A level end faster and i can get more leisure time ...haha .. yeah .. i miss the time of playing guitar and singing with my dear friends ...is really nice when u and your small group of friends gather together and worship ...=D

it is funny to see the woo learnt her chinese ... haha ...and yeah ! finally someone stands at the same side as me! haha.. how happy i am ! heheee ...

today i participated the Family Day organised by my church... as i reflect i wonder had i done my part? haix ... feels a bit guilty ...=S

watched Charlie with ac gang of friends yesterday...hmm..is rather disappointing to me .. but hmm..well ..its audience more for a whole family kind ? therefore it must accomodate ?

wat else ? haha ...im rather disorganise .. cant have proper thoughts .. but hmm...well ..today is a an enjoyable day...things are doing fine for me i guess ... just that phy test is coming up on friday ..gona tear my hair off soon...hahaha ...=P one more day left for me to study ...goodnight people.Zzzzz....

Our faithful God's plan and timing is perfect. =)

i stinks ! yet i cant bathe ... bathrooms are not available...im deprived of sleep!!! hahaha ... but anyway i went to a good concert just now with my dad..i think that is the first time that i actually went to such a concert with my dad.

It is a percussion ensemble ... surprsingly my dad enjoyed it ... it is done by Singapore Chinese Orchestra with 3 other percussion bands from Korea China and Europe. Actually chinese orchestra are not that "dull or old-fashion" . They sound really cool today and the audience participation brought the performance to the climax . AH! make me feel like joining CO again..hahaa..im so horrible ..jack of all trades ... so greedy ..wanna learnt everything ...

my eyes are really getting smaller and smaller ...im still waiting!!!! i wana bathe i wana sleep! i wana protest! ohno ...im talking rubbish again ... =P

does anyone buy lottery ?! i got a stack of surveys awaiting !!! who wana help me?!

*yawnx* real tired .................... looking forward to holidays but yet not looking forward ...........
haha ... stresses are piling up again !!!

firstly demoralised...... when practising harp today seriously i cannot make it ..i keep on panic and cannot play the right note...and there's only me and alo ..so is unlike in band ...others blasing sound can cover ur awful playing...so what im playing is gona be obvious..ahhh....scared! monday is the perofrmance yet i still play so unsteady...

secondly, im seriously learning physcics very slowly...i have been telling my tutor i will ask him question but im still not prepared to ask ! He's too nice and too patient towards me until im so mad to myself that why am i so slow in understanding that he has to wait for me to ask him qn..he say i must know what i dunno...but there's here and there i dunno ..yet here and there i know ...how to compile everytthing and ask?

thirdly , they showed us our cohord performance in maths..ok im at the very far end of the sea .. which they call i have yet to reach the "shore"...haha...more chapters coming up ...2D trigo..vectors...more graphs...maths induction...wopps...need practice..thx abi for telling me her study tips...i think it helps...=P so im gona start doing at least 2-3qn of maths everyday..then wun pile up the tutorials...

haha....okie hope it didn demoralise u about studying..actually studying in really nice ... im serious ...just that mastering it is difficult...
*stresses attack* haha...so hide where?!!! evacuate !!!!hurry! haha..ok lame ..
but yup ... today's devotion was "trust in the Lord with all your heart and all your mind and all your soul,and He will make ur paths straight"
is so easy to depend on your own strength in the end u wear urself out...there's only one place that we can run to that is under the shadow of the Almighty ... where we can renew our strength from and continue to run the race...blab blab blab...i feel like running too...oo..tomorrow is body combat ! hahaha..yeah ! more fats can be burnt off...haha ..
anyway let's not give up...studying is fun wat! right?!=P