the DA CHANG JING show really very nice leh.
now i know why so many people are crazy about it.
especially aunties.
haha.

mentioning about aunties, today i was studying at mac,
suddenly was very disturbed by the chattering of an auntie with another listening.
they are educated aunties i believe, they are talking about some politics in some company.
then she complaine about the unfairness..and blab..
its no very loud but still i can hear quite clearly plus her action it makes everything very obvious.
i only have one concluding statment , i really don't like aunites to have long long complaines...
when i look at them the image of a witch will just appear in my mind.
haha. i dun mean it. i mean u can complaine but u koe not for nearly an hour non-stop.

had bbq with CGS gals today.
haha. they are CRAZY bunch of people.
to kanice: are u sure u can tag my blog everyday?=P
haha. but being with them makes me feel like a sec.sch girl again.
makes me feels that young again! haha.
the craziness we do. the noise we make. the laughters.....
i didn't eat much. i seriously dun like BBQ food.
i feel the fats...and oil...eeeee......haha.
i sound so health conscious lah!

yar.back to shld i join band.
let me try to weigh it.
join band : experience to play in a full band again. memories to be kept. there's no more chance after this to play in band again.have a tight timetable, then u will be more conscious in spending ur time.
don't join : because i was loose freedom of time, i will be tied down to commit a large portion of my time to practices. i cant commit to harp. cant wear the gown.haha. cant have time to meet up with people. need to assure my parents. cannot let them worry.

yar, sort of know. must be rational lah.
so..IM NOT GOING TOMORROW.
no band for me. =(
yar sad. but must see the big pix.

saw Winnie on the way home. a senior in band.haha.
she cant remember my name.woooah. of course lah. =P

dun procrastinate ur work. it feels good to complete ur hw so early!

wanted to post pix. but failed to receive from kanice. so too bad no pix! >.<

i was thinking what songs to choose for this coming sun worship for the past few hours.
this time round was rather hard because im not very clear what msg shld i present.

today's harp practice was a quality one. i like it!
But you see it's not always a quality one , so i still prefer band. much more.

i doolded at the walls at far east! haha. its my first time. wrote lame things.

i saw people having camps.
i miss having games and camps
i remember the old fond memories once again.

ohyar. today bus driver checked on me!
he requested for my ez-link and questioned me which sch i was from.
and i was very pissed.
how could he doubt on me! i was wearing my sch uniform!
urgh.

i saw pris that day! yes i know that day! haha.
fri.10.03.06
it was really an unexpected one.
i took the wrong direction to go PS
i took to bugis instead.haha.
then as i U turn...
tada! i saw someone in her st mag uniform!
then tada! is wanxian! hahaha!
she rocks! cause she got the same name as me!aha!
actually more than that, she is a very very nice girl. =P

i bought my designer friend's work today at fareast! haha! come and see!i bought this!!!
very nice right? heheee....hand-made k...must buy.

more of it, samples :

u can put it on ur bags, clothes, pencil case..blabblab..anywhere that u can pin it.

Location: FarEast, Inq Box 3rd level. =)

while stock last!

*all taken from may's blog. =)

you learn by alanis morissette

You live, you learn
You love, you learn
You cry, you learn
You lose, you learn
You bleed, you learn
You scream, you learn

You grieve, you learn
You choke, you learn
You laugh, you learn
You choose, you learn
You pray, you learn
You ask, you learn
You live, you learn

=) it's march holi! wat's ur schedule like?
is it gona be a fruitful one?

sigh.

SHOULD I JOIN BAND?

i WANT TO JOIN!

but..............................sobx. ='(

i think im very emotional these few days for not much obvious reasons.

causing my work to be affected.

this is bad, bad, BAD.

i need some help to be a bit more rational.

020306
2 x 3= 6

haha, i tell you!what i met today is really very erm..im dunno how to describe, its so amazing lah!
i bang into three ppl concidently! i mean not those hi bye friend. but friends that im very close to in pri. sch! ok one of them is pei ying so is not counted cux i see her every sun. haha...but i tot to her alot too!

ok..here it goes. today is VERY good day, BECAUSE! haha! tomolo no sch!
cux of JAE and then today i ended sch quite early i guess...
haha..cux got dental at 3pm so left sch early, and my dentist see me before 3 cux i reached there at 230pm so like hmm left at 3!
hahaha..that's so good...so ok time to go home! planned to sleep hahaha...which is such a great enjoyment to me!haha..=D
sat there. waiting for my train to come. looked up,
I saw a very familiar figure...
a person not too tall , with that familiar punk punk hairstyle and that same coloured bag , walking to wards my direction. " ah! is shuzk meng!" haha! my very good friend since pri.3 ! do u koe we manage to keep in contact since then?! still can tok any thing under the sun =D haha...

yes! it's her! aha! it's really such a concidence cause u see i dun always go otram park!haha, yeah ! someone to go home with me together to lakeside , and can catch up! it has been long since we really can tok..hahaha...though she came to my sch funfair didn really properly tok much .hahaha. lalala..tokt tok tok...then on the train saw pei ying loh..she look so lost lah..hahaa..and she got her hair cut. =)

she suggested for a lunch! haha..though im quite lazy to...but heheee...this is such a rare opportunity loh! hahaha..drop off at je and had lunch at jec kfc.
.i love the little chat with had..tok abt ur amibition my amibition ur sch life and blab...and things that are once ur fav. hmm....=D im just so happy to spend little time together again!

we took 335 together. it's really had been long since i have friends that took really abt the exact same route that i go home, not counting those who stay same blk as me lah.hahaha.

while boarding the bus, i saw this gal , i tot she was from china(hehehee..) and wanted to ask my for some direction. TO MY BIGGEST SURPRISE! this person is chuan hui! we same class since pri.3 too!!!!!! but only get to know her truly better in pri.5 and 6.hahaha! and i find her accent really like foreginer loh! hahahaha...it's such a big change..haha..but yet she still sounds and look that gentle.haha..she is studying what she is passionate for that is designing in napfa...then get to work somewhere where she like that is childcare.

shuzkz, i know u really envy her.haha ...but welll.....=)

when i saw my pri. sch friends..there's just this weird feeling .
dun raelly koe how to describe.
like we are so familiar with each other yet a bit strange....
like want to really care how has she been but dunno how to talk smoothly..
just now i keep on tounge tied lah..if u had realise ..hahaha
im shy! haha...
18 years old! we are all standing in different position , facing different things....
walking different paths...
weird. its just weird. my thoughs are just confusing....hmm...

but well . im still very happy =D to get to see and tok to u all again.
today the tightening of my braces are really pain. urgh.haha.
i miss you all!

IM A LOUSEY MONEY KEEPER!
urgh. yet im being assigned as tresurer in class ( it was said to be temporary, hm, but it seems im permanent now liao lah! )
and also a mini tresurer in my cell.
and im really very untrustable.
now im stuck with all the accounting for both groups.
because one of the factor is i use the money.that time during new year i used the money to pay for my stuffs first then ask the money from parents then pay back. but now my accounts are all in amess. and i have to scarifice my time to settle it. i wanted to complete my hw one...sobx.
sorry.....i koe im a bad bad person. have been trying to learn this lesson for quite some years.
urgh. i got my punishment liao that is to use my hongbao money to fill the hole up.

Lord, please help me to me be a good money keeper. =S

crescent sch prog just ended. and thank God, get to build rapport with the gals. but though i suppose to facilitate in the prog. i feel myself learning too!

good pratices of a leader
(Leadership appears to be the art of getting others TO WANT to do something you are convinced should be done. - Vance Packard)

1) inspiring a shared vision
2) challenging the process
3) enabling others
4) encourage the heart
5) model the way

some key pts that impact and remind me the most is to challenge the process. my experience of retaining really speaks lots. that is to be pro-active in my studies. must always ASK! CALRIFY DOUBTS! why am i scared how ppl will think of me? im responsible for my accademic performance.
secondly will be enabling others and encourage the heart. may i continue to learn to be concern for others from the bottom of my heart and always seek to let them give out their full potential in them.

mrs teo also shared something. there's always bound to have fustrations and dissapoinments, each of us have two choice : to react to it or respond to it?
well i guess u have the ans. =)

leaders often feel lonely.who is there to understand what he or she sees and what to achieve for the benefits of others? being a leader, you must be confident in yourself. but human is just a tiny little thing , we are not even sure of our furture and the outcome , so what and where is the confidence based on? i think that boils down to asking who are we?

if i lost my identity of being a child of God, i seriously lost everything. cause what's there in me that i can be proud abt?

to find the meaning in life, first have to get ur relationship with God right again.

woah i wrote so long today. aha. in a refelction mood mah. aha!
aha. eek. got this disgusting worm stick on my chem w/s! and its juice is in green! YUCK!
this remind me of ah lei. haha...the queen of insects.

gdnite! =P

i ate subway on monday tuesday and weds!
mon : something with honey oat
tues: ham with something
weds: roast beef with italian hearty!
i love subway! cux it is healthy and it wun make u feel guilty.aha!

well. i think this year God has prepared lots of lessons ahead for me to learn. It is good right? yar, obviously it will be good. but still i feel very fearful and intimidated.
today nearly get drowned in the pool during swim PE , the experience of struggling for survival makes me feel frighten and scared. This is dunno my no. wat time almost drowned. cux of my fear of deep pool that make me so panic.

actually there's lots more. But well, sure discover one by one in detials.

eeeee, the feeling of wanting to join band came back again.
another round of struggle. eeeee. >.<

im so sad!
today i wanted to chop chop go buy this PONY shoe that i saw which is like half price on monday! original price was 59 so its will be $29 after discount.HOWEVER! to my horror! as i chop chop down to orchard after sch todae..IT IS SOLD OUT! i really need a pair of shoes besides my sports shoe because i only have one pair of heels now and my sports shoe not counting my one pair of slipper. this pair of shoes is really unqiue , the kind of green it has is like hmm...that kind of jade green? baby coloured...yar is like converse shoe that kind of style but with a lot of patchy pattern. Hahaha i was sulking lah...the shop person which is a guy look rather cute...ahem ahem..he dunno how to help me but to keep on apologise.ahahaha..plus plus chun chun was there for me! haha...then we walk to find some"hope" of getting nice and cheap shoe..i saw! its 10 dollar!!!!! BUT THEN dun have my size! SOBX. so bad. in the end i bought this $8 slipper hopefully it wun lok sloppy if i wore it to church.

and i ate lots of CHOCOLATE todae. i didn have a proper meal.(except dinner) hmm, not realli on purpose.
early in the morning sat at the void deck with my class mates , list of food i ate in that free periods : hello kitty biscuit coated with choc, few bits of my friend yan's choc muffins, my own bread from home coated with nutella. yar!
following free period: choclate flavoured polky(is this the right spelling)
ok the only thing that is not choc i ate todae are the drinks: sugarcane..oo i ate kiwi too! glad there's no choc.
went orchard and grab this combo thing..dunno called what.shared with chun. but it is significantly with a thick layer on chocolate on it. and a cup of orange juice that come with it.

home food is the nicest. seriously.aha.=)
tata for now. im gona do my hw.lee wan xian is guai one. =p

who dont' like to be feel loved and doted?
with just one person focusing the attention on you
sharing the sweetest memories with you alone?

sweet words and promises, i hope its not a dark pit that is going deeper and deeper.
because once fall in, i don't know how long it will take one to climb up again.
promises of an eternity, of forever...are you sure u can fulfil it?
are you aware how fragile it is?

im worried for you.
i really don't want you to feel the hurts that i experienced before.
im scared it breaks you into so many pieces that you may not stand up again.
of course, i will never want to wish this day ever happen to you.



are we sure that we are up to it? how stubborn can we be, we know its dangerous, yet often we give ourselves excuses and continue to follow what our hearts desire. (do you know that our hearts are actually decitful?) Perhaps, sometimes we even lied to ourselves that"i will be the exception."
but if i never experinced the hurts before, i will never learnt what love really is[this is only possible if i truly come to know Him] and perhaps continue to love in a wordly manner. But not everyone can learnt it after one lesson , some may become a bitter person or some continue to numb themselves....
you all are friends that i care and loved , i hope you all will be alright. really.

because my Saviour is in control. i can have my peace in Him.=)

im tired!im tired!im tired!
legs are aching terrbibly.....
well yup.FUN-O-RAMA 18 is over liao!..
hmm...had fun time selling..though the amt of drinks we mange to sell are disappointing..sigh...
but had fun with my classmates..little joy, surprises laughters..are enough to sustain the smile on my face!=D=D
haha..
- blowing bubbles are fun!
- having balloons on hands are fun!
- buy things for ppl are fun!
(bought a big sunflower for shuzkz [we looked quite les today,haha,but well we are straight loh.its just that we too long nv see each other,hope she is really alright])
- got ramly burger! enci!thank you!!
- seeing familiar faces popping out infront of ur stalls are sweet and fun!
(miss them lots..memories will start to pour back again)
- Emerald green ..sounds nice? haha..but its not appealing..customers felt cheated.but is nice to drink loh.
- bought ac files
- cracking my head of how to use my coupons wisely but a bit regreat of not saving 2 dollar to buy ballons.haha.

well will try to pose the photos! it rained today u koe?

well how abt my chinese competition? well it is embarassing! disspoment! i really really wana do ac proud..wana show others like who say ac all is ang mo...got exception k..ac is not that bad..
but i forgot my speech! it sounded well in the beginning...then slowly slowly..i forget and forget and forget.......................................sobx! *embarassed*

well. thank God for today. today i didn flare up at the person that im irritated with. that's very gd! its was rather smooth .im not boiled today.haha.

ITS SO HARD TO LOVE !!!
sigh. im so irritated by some ppl. i seriously detest some ppl that i met...and wonder why i ever will meet such ppl....
sigh. im seriously trying very hard to be gentle and to accomodate and to be caring. but i failed again and again.

im also a person that is also vey detestable in God's sight if it wasn't Jesus's blood that cleanses me.
but...sorry...ok i will really try....but sometimes by just hearing the person's voice alrady make me boil very high...maybe shot up to 1000 degree C...

FUN O RAMA is this coming sat! hehee...my churchmates are coming down so happy!!haha..but the experiments trip down to chun hse...are quite exciting but tiring too...and im having a competition on the very day of fun o rama too! how fun!hahaha...well..it's been long since i participat in the chi oraltorical(dunno how to spell) competiti0on...going to 3 years i think...but this is something i wana try and brush myself...participate in competitions is good. =)

its very irritating that alot of ppl keep asking u to buy our funfair tix rite? i koe..well...its very irritating for me to sell too..cux i have to sort of like beg and force..hahaha...
well. amazingly..someone reminded me abt God's leading in this selling too...haha...though is rather small..but i do agree...God take care of me in every single part of my life.
is like time is running out....peeps that i want them to come from church supposdly to have some cell discussion in the afternoon....but then amaazingly it has to change to the morning due to some reasons...then...my one or two..come and help me buy pull their friends to buy from me...small effort..but GREATLY APPRECIATED!! =D=D=D

IM SO HAPPY AND HIGH NOW! IM GONA SING LALALALALALALA! =D
how can i ever stop praising You?

today is the day where all graduates of 2005 will be super duper nervous--> the arrival of the results.
the weird thing is, im nervous too! i guess it is because many ppl that i care for are receiving back their results too.hee.=P
i cracked my head of thinking what to say to them to make them less nervous or how should i say to let them feel encouraged or at least have the hope for the future. but i know this is impossible. cux neither me nor anyone are sure of the future. i bet even fortune tellers who claims that they can predict the future does not knows what is ur future like in every single details. but even they do know do u really want to ask them?
the future indeed is full of uncertainties. but it depends u are in whose hands. no one can assure u abt ur future. whenever phrases like"u can do it","u will do well" it really makes me wonder,really? 100% sure?
but with God , i can safely say : i know whatever result it is , it will not be bad cause He has the plans for me.He has planned my future in full details in a way it will prosper me and not harm me.so whatever outcomes or situations in my life..i know i will be safe. as He is the hope of my future.=) and this will keep me joyful til the day i met Him face to face.

awww..my stomach is feeling awful....is so pain until i have to cuddle myself up...
must be the junks i ate over the new year...aww.....=S help....

im sick again! sickness: headache (processing to fever), sorethroat,cough.let me start counting one year i must sick how many times. i know last year in one year i sick more than 5 times. let's see what's the record for this year. =P
now i cant do anything...is like no energy...im gona slp after typing this...urgh. feel so useless like that.
ok i think the honeymoon weeks is officially ended. cux this coming week will be the...end sch at 430 and guess what there's additional period called the zero period so sch ends at 510pm!!! the zero period is for the preparation for fun-o rama. oh yar! please buy tickets from me. haha.=P

i see me j2 friends like everyday so gloomy like that leh...also dunno how to cheer them up.sigh. j2 life really very cham leh...i know.

ahh..my head aches. cant write any further. shall just end here. ttfn!

the breeze is back...oolalala..i love it! haha...

today i nearly get beaten up lah...i mean really. cause right..anway i was at je walking towards the bus interchange..u know the shelter? yar...there is this grp of malay guys 3 of them i think from ITE...then at the traffic there i dunno why im staring at them .i was actually stoning lah..so no expression look fierce...ok nvm...then walk and walk..then u know got this fair on ur left with the television and all..then they played the rock song..then they someone sang it out loud...i turned back..with a look that look angry...haha..i didn frown but i was stoning so when i turn back..to my horror i saw the three guys staring back at me..ok i didn showed my horror so it looked as if i diao them...then they start saying to me ..."why u turn back" " you never see people sing before ah"..i just keep on walking pretending i nv hear...then they say a bit more ...then i hurry walk off..thx God they never follow me ..or else i will die.haha. now i know how ppl get beaten up when they "diao" ppl.

awww...dad..keep on nagging abt me that im idleing around..keep on saying how to get thru j1 this year...ahyoi!!!
ok.matter of fact..i did all the pre lecture preparation...did as many tutorial qn as i can...but last year i already dunno the first few topics well wat..so i cant finish the tutorial...cux i dun understand so waiting for the lectuer to teach me.

i got a serious problem here : now when i see phy i will automatically wana switch off...how !!! i still choose it as core subject..i like the subject...but i fear the subject...
i got the solution! i need someone to do phy hw with me....really ..it works..cux when i switch off means i wana run away means i wana sleep....who wana do phy with me!
sigh . my dear juniors all choose bio chem...still cant find the rare ones who took phy maths...i wonder who is in the same class as me! im so scared! yet excited.
dear xiang helped me checked out liao...im in 1SA5.sounds really cool. i hope i can fit it ya.tomolo is our first contact time i wonder...

grace went back australia....though this is her 3rd time coming back to sg and going back..still got that feeling of sadness...the u know..hope u are here..not there...kind of feeling...gona see her onli june..by then she will complete her biggest exam..and preparing to go Uni. so fast rite...everything is just in a year.

yesterday the met up with grace and jo. woah..its been long since we last hang out...just sit at bk and tok...i think fairfield ppl like to sit down somewhere and just start stoning or toking or something...haha...last time we always hang out in sch ... or dover..or clementi...haha..jo say she wants to have four kids!!so rare rite?she want to get married either 25 or 26!haha...then she want her first baby after getting married for a year! must note this down...haha...then by then i can call her auntie jo.haha...

saw someone's nick something like this...memories is just like on going film without sound...i think is quite true to a large extend..the fun i have with my juniors now..make the fairfield warm warm feeling back to me again..but ...is soon as we part into different classes ... is just gona integrated into my memory bank...something that cannot withdraw like switzerland bank...well...tell me what can last till the eternity?
FOG (fairfield OG!)- once a fairsian always a fairsian. =)

the weather is so nice and cooling! though is a bit too cold...but i like this kind of weather! hee..i just enjoyed a cup of hot milo. the feeling is so shiok! hee...it was raining "BIG" cats and "BIG" DOGS just now, everywhere is like flooded, its so nice to get a free cab ride home...hehee...=P i got short cool hair now...and lots of people say is nice! haha..all thankx to my ah ling for introducing such a nice saloon! haha........lalala...im going to me lala land...to meet my pinky tree.....ok..im not making any sense here and there's no meaning to it so no need to try to figure.haha!

note: guard ur heart and use the vibrant that a youth has to serve the Lord faithfully. =)
= the joy of my Lord is my strength =

God is good.God is faithful.God is gracious. God is love.God is wonderful cousellor.God is Amighty.God is my strength.God is my joy.God is my everything!God is good.God is faithful.God is gracious. God is love.God is wonderful cousellor.God is Amighty.God is my strength.God is my joy.God is my everything!God is good.God is faithful.God is gracious. God is love.God is wonderful cousellor.God loves christa.God is Amighty.God is my strength.God is my joy.God is my everything!God is good.God is faithful.God is gracious. God is love.God is wonderful cousellor.God is Amighty.God is my strength.God gives me peace.God loves wan xian. God is my joy.God is my everything!God is good.God is faithful.God is gracious. God is love.God loves me me me!God is wonderful cousellor.God is Amighty.God is my strength.God is my joy.God is my everything!God is good.God is faithful.God is gracious. God is love.God is wonderful cousellor.God is Amighty.God is my strength.God is my joy.God is my everything!God is good.God is faithful.God is gracious. God is love.God is wonderful cousellor.God is Amighty.God is my strength.God is my joy.
God is my everything,everything,everything!=D

tomorrow is school reopen. i think those graduates from secondary schools..are rather excited. but frankly speaking im not. i seriously dunno how is gona be like when i step back in sch. as i reflected back 2005...what i see is really darkness...the feeling yucks big times...and thus i really really dun want to go back and suffer again. sigh sigh...i want to run away...haha..but yar i know i cant run away. i know i know.

see...times can be really tough and difficult...seriously without God i dunno how to tide thru with a smile. "with Christ in the vessel i can smile at the storm!" haha. He provides me with friends!you know u heard of ac culture right...very negative right..but the friends i met are really great and nice...not a "product" of ac culture...haha..

God's plans are the best for me and His thought are far greater than my thoughts. as i look ahead the year 2006...i saw alot of heaps....u koe..like when u run ur mac ritchie..haha..so many steep slopes...but when u come down is so shuang...so yar..climbing hard up ....but..haha..the end result will be great! haha...my chacter will be moulded. becoming more woman. ahahahahahaa.

*with tears* no matter how tough this year gona be. God will be enthroned in my heart. and He will be with me to tide thru my storms , waves, thurders...watever that is nasty.yeah! =P

haha... how did u countdown yesterday?
i also hope myself to be somewhere whereby i can see big big fireworks *pui*pui* infront of me...haha.... but i koe it's quite impossible so i hope for another thing hope that i can get the u koe the stick kind of fireworks...hahaha...so i tried to persuade my churchmates to go with me and try out 7-11...ok i know.i xin fu kou fu that 7-11 DUN SELL such things. ahaha.

well. but im very happy to be with all my sisters and brothers in christ yseterday. yesterday my church have this 'shi ge zhan mei hui' whereby u can see people ranging from the oldest to the youngest come to present items to praise God..i dunno how to describe how touching it was...but it was really a historical moment. u really miss it if u are not there to see. =) i believe that God will revive JCC too... and today the new pastor officially step up. =P

ok. so this is how we countdown. i think we are rebellios, or rather i am .haha cux i die die also dun want to go home before 12....since it's already near 11 might as well wait rite? k cant find fireworks...so how to celebrate countdown? we discussed intesively....haha...but well seems that nothing exciting come out. by the time we tal finish its already ard 1130pm...how how? ok..stoning starts to creep in...we tired to da fa shi jian by taking photos...in the end...just sit down there....and continue stoning....haha..stone and stone...many left onli left me,EC,EW,SE,thomas,sem and another guy...sorry i dunno his name.=S so ok... 1150pm..what to do...someone suggested the rooftop.wat do u called rooftop in chi? is "yang tai" or "tian tai"....guess wat i say "yang tai" ..so embarassing lah...haha...btw the way up to the rooftop i locked..so we climbed in...haha...as usual im clumsy as ever...need the most help to get in and out...hahahaha...so we stood there..for 1 or 2 min? then we hear the sound of counting down from the nearby CC..then we followed them and count..10...9...8..7..6..5..4..3..2...1 ! happy new year!we shook one another's hands..haha...that's it..climbed out and go home liao.hahaha..sound so boring rite?haha..well i enjoy it though..haha..it's lame..but it's nice cux im with my sis and brothers in christ!hahaha...

there's another part to the story.,.poor khai and her bro...left church way before us...but the irritating 98 took to so long to come...they end up counting down at the bustop...haha..

ok.i know this is a boring entry. but it's something i want to remember.haha. so.yarloh.it'smyblog wat.hahaha...ok im going to look thru my new year resolution again...hehee..i will consider to post it up..=)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

friendster can be quite addictive i think...i kept looking at people photos and is going to be an hour...how scary...i think...many things u know it just become memories and u cant turn it back and cant have it back liao...quite sad hor...yarloh...i really miss secondary school days very badly...but let's stop dreaming to be back into secondary school days...aww..the feeling is awful...=S

have you watched narnia?
must go and watch ok...it's very nice and very touching.
woah.did i tell you?
im most touched at the scene of the battle.
wana know why?
it reminded me about the fact that all christians are constantly in this spirtual warfare.
yar, battling gainst the evil Satan for the good cause of doing God's work and living up a life pleaseing to Him.
however many a times we fail..we give in ..(sometimes we didn't even know) letting Satan have a foothold...
how's the situation in your life? are you still fighting hard? still standing as firm as before?or you wanted to retreat? just want to be a christian that dun fight.(that's weird!)
i think most importantly we have to examine the willingness of our heart.
are you willing? to die in this battle? or are you ready? to fight in this battle.
many people died for the good cause. died cause they want to share God's good news.
how abt me? i was guilty cux i know i still didn give all i have and go all the way just to share the good news. many a times, i will lost the friendships with my friends. and cux my own spiritual battle in my daily life. it's so hard to react in all situation in a Christ-like manner and attitude.
"For Narnia, for Aslan"
let's continue to encourage one another to not to give up in running the race. amazingly this was the verse I came across during QT yesterday,
"therefore,since we are surroundeded by a great cloud of witnesses,let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely,and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,looking to Jesus the founder and perfecter of our faith..." Hebrews 12:1-2

let God's love to us be our motivation in running this race.=D

hello peeps~ !it's christmas!!!! christmas!!!! =D

i wana wish you a merry christmas,
i wana wish you a merry christmas!
i wana wish you a merry christmas
from the bottom of my heart ah!!! hee ~come sing with me!hee!

but hor u koe hor...christmas wihtout jesus has no meaning le...so let us also put aside a time for God to thank Him for loving us so much to send His son on earth to die for us.He don't need to u koe u koe?

if you have the time to spend crazy times with your friends must cherish, cux someone peep have to spend time in their lab! sigh sigh.

hee, well thankies for all our lovely cards and presents!!! hee...i love chocolate i love choclate!

hey EC i love your magnet...IT'S OK TO BE SLOW BUT JUST DUN STOP.
hee~ trying to suan me at the same time it encouraged me =P

what you want for christmas? =)
reminder: sch is one week away.................................................

tired. i think for the next many entries im just gona keep on repeating this.

sigh. i dun like the feeling of hmm....not being able to achieve the ideal case. it embeds the feeling of rejection.
sounds like a perfectionist ya? im quite a perfectionist actually...but over the years... it's not that much now....it's that good or bad?

brain: im tired.
mind: im tired too.
heart: im tired three.

how i wish someone can just carry moi..

hm, realise my posts are always speech. lets have some pix here! here it goes..

grace came back to SG for christmas!!! yeah i got grace for christmas!our first outing was to go and watch eu and jo performance at esplanade(BandFestival06)...some lame pix that we took:



we started off rather normal......however.....as we continue to walk on....

our funny faces start to appear.... the very first one...(trying to boo boo the esplanade?)

i think it was me having a problem..haha..cant even be normal with the subsequent photos..

we tried another funny act: indian dance ( isn't it cool to dance infront of fullerton?)

this was a huh pose... i think we are trying to act being flatten by a car...???


i tell u! it's not on me and grace are weird. eu is even worst loh u see:


so do u know what are they trying to find?i dunno u know..

at least we ended: normal. big smile! haha...cant help not to smile with them ard.=P

i shall post more next time.=P i bought my dress today ...yawnx.tiring walked the whole day . gdnite peeps =)

something to add on: kay wanted to give me her jean yip vochuer so that i can have the free trail of two slimming session. that's very thoughful of her hor? hee..but too bad im under 18. ahahahaa...come to think of it it's very funny. please loh...i seriously cant imagine myself doing those session...the machinese and the fats.weird.aha.=p

i felt so loved when i received a genuine present. yup. it definately lifted my spirit up!hee.=D
hm. i really wana buy something useful for those people that i love and care...but i have no finincial! haha...seriously...i can only make things..but hor...im so busy now that its hard for me to have time to make. i really really hope i can finish all my xmas card by thurs..so that i can send it on time! brrr.....haha..actually i got lots to share and say .. but too tired. gotta do lots of work.

its a headache to shift and buy new furnitures. ah!=P
thx God for keeping me safe and giving my strength to pull through the day.
Thank you peeps for keeping me in your prayers. =)

hello!=) you know what? i just chatted to someone whom i dun really know and also dun really know how she look..for one hour plus!! im really happy and amazed how God has enabled the conversation to be smooth....it is an unexpected conversation which i thank God for it. =) may God continue to enable me to know each youth that i come across genuinely and make me an instrument to share His good news and love with them. =D

if one were to ask me how am i recently? i seriously dunno how to answer. i can only conclude that im really tired in all ways. there's so many things i wana do. but i fail to do it. my memory fails . my strength fails. my will fails. i must declare that im limited, it is impossible for me to accomplish things by myself.

to my heavenly Father,
please continue to keep me faithful to the end and continue to be my source of joy and strength.
I know that im limited i need You to accomplish the things with me.
Your daughter

tomolo is a time for pot luck ! yippee! my last and first one pot luck was in sec 2.haha.meat balls.hee.tomolo gona wake up early to make crab mayo omellete! haaha...hope it works..haha..ah!left 5 hrs of slp....goodnite!=)

guess what did i do today?! come guess!
ans: I CLIMBED 13 FLIGHTS OF STAIRS.
conclusion: im mad for wanting to do some excercise.=P
results: spinning head.legs and hands turn into jelly.

by the way i lived on the 20th storey. so i took a lift down and up again. I really felt my whole head spinning, and my legs and hands have no strength at all...i shouldn't have risk, haha..moral of the story , dun ever risk ur live for beauty sake. wahahahaa.=P

The Unwanted Gift

It was laying on the table
Still and unpackaged.
The maker spent hours on it;
Doing it with all his/her heart and efforts,
Trying his/her very best to make it presentable.
He/she hopes that the receiver will be filled with sweetness and joy
Upon receiving this prepared gift.

But now despite the gift was done
And despite the maker was pleased with it,
It was not presented.
He/she tried,
But the response was hostile.
What do you suggest the maker to do?
Continue to try to give?
Or continue to leave it laying on the table, collecting dust?




Because of love, you will still give.

251105
i was very happy that day because we had a family outing! do u know that is really rare for my family to go on a outing?(in fact i don't remember any outing like this) it was my mum's birthday. =) my dad and sis took leave and we went outing at orchard. orchard - werid place for dad. but still i see him grin from ear to ear.
the picture: just me my sis my dad and mum ...went shopping. walk along at orchard road.we just go anywhere that mum wants to go.
sis: u want to buy ur shoes right?
we pulled her, and we stepped into our first destination : charles and keith.sis bought a pair of new shoes for her.
me: so where u want to go for ur sec stop?
mum: i want to eat ice-cream
sis: ok! let's go to gleto(ok i dunno how to spell)
we all had ice-cream..sat at the fountain at taka and apprecating one of my mum's favourite dessert.followed by shopping for clothes...haha...dad was bored ..but neverthless he is still happy. =)
well. i just wana note this down...so that i will remember this happy pix. well. only God knows very well that this picture is not easy to achieve for my family...espcially..we are a chinese traditon family. we are rather shy in expressing our love for each other. even expressing here now i feel weird. haha.

ohya! we end off with a dinner at soup restaurant! just wana recommend ...if u got any family outings there's really a nice place to have dinner...the soup are really nice...i drank frog saliva for dessert...hahaha..it was sweet~ =P

computer breaks down again! what im seeing now is a screen that is really white. it hurts my eyes. sigh.
i watched Harry Potter with Kay they all todae! well. haha...me and kay are the most timid ones.u shld had seen how we hold on to each other when the evil peeps in the show POPs out.wahaha..i think im gona miss kay real badly next year. she really brought alot of joy to me.=)

the weather is so nice today! the feeling is so shiok when u step out after bathing and the breeze just wooshh pass u...woah.it's really nice to sleep in this weather!
i feel "poetic" todae. so i should "try" to make my thoughts sounds like a "poem".haha.

can u feel the icy breeze today?
this is the breeze that i loved and enjoyed the most.
feeling its gentleness as it passes me.
it has a special scent, which brought back a not too long ago memories.
as the memories flashes, it had made me felt a sense of sweetness.
but it has also made me remembered the bitterness.
though the bitterness no longer grab a hold of me
but i still whined a little of wanting back the good old memories.

ohoh. i dunno how to put my thoughts in words liao.hmm......ohno. i really dunno how to say! i will think again. haha.=P i wana sleep! dun wana miss the good chance of slping.haha!

p.s ok it's obvious. my english still cannot make it. what a choppy poem.hahahahaha.

how one's life should be like?

why am i asking myself such qn. this is such a dangerous signal. *thinking hard* am i busy with the right stuffs? am i busy at a right way? is this the way i should serve? am i neglacting anyone that is close to my heart right now? am i? am i...???

*yawnx* still wondering...
but i know im really tired today. near 4 hrs of meeting. 3hrs of typing minutes in CHINESE.(only completed 3 out of 12) how horrible. i really dunno what i wana achieve this coming week. seems that things are becoming more like an obligation. THAT'S VERY BAD. i know. gona sort it out through prayers....

im was angry today.
no. 1) travel all the way down to school end up..practice cancelled. no notice was given. SL THOUGHT that teachers will be there so we will still be able to get the key to practise, but in the end NO TEACHERS -> NO KEY -> CANNOT PRACTISE.
WASTE MY TIME!

so i travel to CCK.. going to meet someone at 3 pm there...
walked ard lot 1 to try to get some stuff for my friend's birthday.. but cant find what i want...walked finish..go grab a bite..try not to eat so expensive one...i realise the cheapest meal was KFC $2.55 from shroom meal...but! it so unhealthy! ..can u believe it ..foodcourt food are at lesat 3 dollars more expensive than KFC! i got myself a plate of mee siam...which the serving is quite small...ahhhhh..feel so cheated.

no.2) "Poooot" i didn't fart. guess wat....MY HANDPHONE DROP INTO THE MEE SIAM!!!
i was panicked, without any hesitation i picked up hp ...poor motorola E398...stained with meesiam....i tried to "save" it ..but i dun have tissue! how! i walked towards the cleaner...asked her politely to lend me her cloth to clean...guess what! SHE SNAPPED AT ME!and say: YOUR OWN THINGS OWNSELF GO AND FIND WAYS TO WIPE. I WILL NOT HELP U.
i was so mad. cna u imagine the gravy just keep on dripping dirtied my skirt and shirt and she still dun wan to help. with my sticky hands , one holding my hp one holding my wallet i hurriedly walk to the drink stall to buy a packet of tissue. sigh. now i got a "messiam hp" i still can smell the meesiam from it...eee..

no.3) i sat at Macs..it was ard 130pm ...waited..for the person to come...330pm..she didn't turn up...awww.....im glad Michelle is ard..or else i will be even more cham...

ok at least i brought somethings with me...so i can do..i sat til 530..yar.the chair must be realli hot...haha

well. but the day ended with a positive note!i met dx! finally...we have been asking each other out to tok since promo ended?finally...haha...
well it's very true that true friends doesn't have to see each other everyday to maintain a friendship....the conversation is really quality!..haha..im always very thankful and amazed when i can still remain close with a friend despite we hardly see and tok to each other so much..=D

im really happy to see her growing , learnt stuff from her...her experience when she share with her friends...
yar indeed. evangelism is not by ourselves. but we are teamed up with God. =P
p.s. go and care. go to where they are.

hello. i ate lots of things yesterday. that i skip my dinner.haha.
list of things i ate for lunch:
curry chicken ( super duper oily that i dare not drink the curry)
rice ( cooked with chicken oil)
durian ice kachang ( imagine it has such high sugar contain)
roti boy ( can't resist the temptation cux it is selling at 90cents..hot buy!)

haha...i feel really fat after eating so many oily and sweet stuff...drank milk for dinner...haha...

i had my first visit to the central national library yesterday!
and i go with her! a new friend that i get to know yesterday! haha ...ming hui! continue to thrist to know God's Words k? im so encouraged by u ! =P

and ahem thx ah i "love" the national library lift. it makes my heart jump out....hahahaha...my legs trembled when i got out of the lift...how embarrassing lah....hahaha

well. im going through a tough time now. it seems that my trail is "growing" bigger and bigger. may i continue to cling on to Him. =P

[me] have you ever wonder why you fail so many times in terms of studies?
[me again] yar...
[me] so what are your thoughts]
[me again] well ... though feeelings sux big time, though I feel so weary, dun understand why i have to suffer and face such terrible horrible thing...im assured that God works for the good purposes for those who love Him
[me] so seems that you see some "light"
[me again] yar..i think one thing that God wants me to learn is not to put me in comfort zone
[me] poor you , since sec 1 u have been changing classes every year .except sec 3&4... changing ur group of friends ..and u say that good?
[me again] yar ... precisely..this shows that God knows me utterly well..He knows that if i always stay in the same class i will get too comfortable and it will be even harder to get out ... i think that's why i always face a lot of changes in terms of environment...i must admit that im really a person who takes a long period of time to adapt and adjust ... though i may appear...emotionally and mentally im not really..i once thought adapting to a new environment is not a problem to me..but i was wrong...He knows me much better than i know myself...
[me] are u just trying to comfort yourself
[me again] obviously not...duh.

i wana be a little lamb of God, always taking a little step of faith to move forward , always learning to trust and obey Him. For He is my good shepherd. =)

my computer is back! no longer the laptop! yeah! woah. i realise my keyboard is so nice to type one. got the bouncy bouncy feeling and the chattering keys sound. sounds crispy to me.hahahahahahahahahaha.and woah ! my screen now is really big! soothe my eyes...haha..=P

though my computer is back but it is reformatted that means!! lots of images are gone. lots of songs are gone. lots of words documents are gone. well well. i think..........that can do some good to me. =)

hey don't worry for me k. i think retain is not a very very very bad thing. is just that i have yet to reach the standard required and therefore i have to be one year slower than others. so im really ok though when people asked me about it ..i still feel er...duno where to hide..haha. it's really a good time to learn the lesson of "humility" =) -learning in process- i graduate liao then tell u ...haha..but i think by that time i will be in heaven...wahahaha..

i still wana say : THANK YOU FOR REMEMBERING ME IN YOUR PRAYERS!

i do still need it... i think especially when school starts. =) now is not yet the worst time and feeling. hm...in the meanwhile im trying to pick up studying intensively again. =) everyone must jiayou!!!

MY THANKSGIVING

thank you Lord for showering me with Your abundant love,joy and peace.
He hears my cries attentively and show me His promises through His Words.
He is always so faithful. =)

i thank Him for the people that He placed in my life.
without them seriously i don't think i can stand up that fast.
hey peeps, thank you so much for your encouragment, support, concern, reminding me to keep my eyes fixed on God, for His plans are always the best for me and His thoughts are higher than my thoughts.

thank you u all for encouragingments( through my blog, sms or words or prayers etc!) are all APPRECIATED! =D

without you all, i dunno i will dwell in my sorrows for dunno how long...hahaha...
especially peeps that i know barely for 7 months in acjc ! im so amazed and surprised by u all the love and warmth....heheheee.... =D
of course my co-workers in yfc and my sis and bro in church too !

it's well with my soul. =) im ready to stand up and fight the battle again.

THANK YOU !!!!!!! love you guys ... =P

you know, im in such a conflicting state of mind. dunno which is the correct attitude that i should take in response to the devasting results. lots of questions on my head. questions that i dunno how to find answer.
well. i only can hold on to one thing that is: God loves me. simple statement yet it is hard to tell ppl exactly how did He shower His love on me in my daily life.

friends asked: how come u can still be so optimistic? after receiving such bad results at the next moment can still smile and say that im craving for brownie..." i wana eat brownie..but very ex leh shld i?..brownie can make me happy loh.."
well. only He can give me this peace and can make me still smile at the storm. =)

well. i only have one wish. that is whatever actions or attitude i take in response to this storm. let it be blameless in His sight.

well. obviously. still sad. but He gave me strength to face tomorrow.Cause He holds my tomorrow.=)

im short fused today.people are getting more short fused too.i wonder how many blown out bulbs will i see tomorrow. i saw my physics teacher today! i dare not look at him. =S *tick.tick.tick. friday is approaching. where's my peace? =S

today with have sexuality education which they emphaise that it is not sex education which i dun understand what's the differnece ?!! haha .. anyway .. my heart sank when i saw people dun find anything wrong in pre-marital marriage. do u koe my teacher agrees that there's no wrong in pre-marital marriage as long as two love each other. what's the world coming to? it's getting to scary.... the values are just so blur in the youth minds now...it seems that absolute rights and wrongs does not exist tothem..there are always a lea way...

well..shall tok more abt it another time...

anway today is wan ting's birthday. well . though is a short party . but i enjoyed. i felt encouraged when i see younger ones growing spiritaully in the Lord. =) and im happy to see cell groups growing. im happy to pray in a group. conclusion : im over-all happy not short fused. =P

i think im getting crazy each day....haha...im feeling that im gona have a fever soon...ohno..what's wrong with me....well...just let me whine now........................................................................and slp:)

i love the night breeze ... so so nice...smells nice too? =)
as i reflect back the times when im preparing for promo ... i couldn't believe that i made it through....the struggles to stay focus in studying..the struggles to cope with my fears..the struggles to be discipline..the stresses..peer pressure... etc....the non-stop battle spiritually and physically...are really frightening to me...
how many times did i actually break down and cry...feeling myself very useless...simple things also cannot conqueor etc...
but really i can only say one thing that is God made it possible for me. He really carried me through these diffcult moments ... comforting me through His words and songs...assures me...providing me strength and rest...
how can i be doubtful to this God who is so real in my life, how can i doubt at His love for me.
truly it's His grace and mercy , that He is willing to love me who is so unworthy of His love.
He is the Kings of kings and Lord of lords yet he still willing to die on the cross for me so that my sins may be cleansed.
His love is so big big big big BIG !!!

now is the awaiting of my results..which will all be out on friday...the thought of me makes my heart panic...but may i also learnt to put my trust and confidence in Him alone and stay focus to do His works.=)

"Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial,because when he has stood the test,he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." James 1:12

may our faith be toughen and not lessen after each round of battle! =P

YES! i finally changed my blogskin ! isn't this so sweet and nice?!! haha! yeah! im really happy to change my blogskin!!! haha...but urgh...the tagboard is not working...urgh urgh...heee...work on it another time...=P ttfn!

ooo...btw...baby blue is flora chan favourite cartoon character! =P

haha...why am i always jotting things down after talking to the wooer?haha..actually it's nice talking to her..can talk very long...hahaha...=D
i think my social circle is quite big...but i think it can be quite scary and tiring?maybe i can say: with more friends come greater responsibilities....sounds familiar?hee...
maybe u can feel belong? when u say hi to more people but then at the same time u will feel superficial? then ok u want to know the person more but that to know a person more needs time and effort...so end up tiring i guess...there's many ppl i wish i could spend more time with but duno how and hard to find time.... haha..maybe that's excuses...it is not impossible, it is posssible one...
i want lesser friends and closer friends..but however if i never had a taste of having more friends i wun know having lesser friends is better and good! contradiction. how to remember to care for ur friends when there's many in ur head...
but im sure God place so many friends in my life for a purpose.=)
sometimes i also think...studying kills me by forgetting to care abt my friends and most impt my family.

there's so many more impt things to do in life. it is definately not boring or meaningless. just look ahead,look at ur holidays, there's so much time that mean u can use it to do many things u that are meaningful besides just having fun...maybe u can go learn a skill..and go benefit others?or go cease the time to clarify or find out any doubts u had in ur life...just go! and dun let this holiday be a meaningless one...=)

yeah.im going shopping with eunice! haha...i think i never go a one to one date formal shopping with her before..despite knowing her for 4years.=D

gdmorning!im sick of studying chinese for 2 hours straight..haha..i have better endurance in studying physics than chinese ! oh my goodness! haha..this give me 2nd though of whether i really wana further my studies in majoring chinese...i dun like to write chinese words , i dun like to read chinese novels so what actually give me the tot of becoming a chinese teacher? haha..like they always tease me "the making of chinese teacher" haha...maybe i shld go major in physics! haha...and see how i die...hahaha...ahh...suddenly im quite lost dunno what to be next time...but haha..i stil got at least one more year for me to think about...

i considered myself as rebellious yesteryda..haha...i was like...i wana be alone.dun come and bug me.i wana surf as much as i want ...sleep as much as i want..dun u dare to interfere.hoping that by deluding myself in doing what i want i can get rid of my pain of cant do my phy paper..which frankly speaking the paper was easier than terms...but well..it didn't make me feel better ..instead i feel worst... the guiltiness of spending my time like that...
haha..i suddenly tot of the famous quote in twelfth night .. "if music be the food of love,play on give me excess of it....." orsino was love sick..im like him but im not love sick...im exam-sick...haha...
u wana shut urself out from everything? the feeling is worst. dun ever try it..bad for health..=P

well..shall go back studying chinese...hopefully can complete the read through today ..is so many pages !! then tomolo can just keep on memorise and memorising...which i dun encourage...chinese shld be alive! wahaha....

it's really hard to give thanks when u r feeling lousey.
i really feel LOUSEY today...depress...i cant do my maths exam ! im really really sad..
that despite the extra practices i got more than others..i still cant do!
is even more depressing when ur friends are comparing ans..and u? can't even get the final ans..
sobx sobx...

see the prob up there? yea...comparison... but...hiax. i really cant think of something to make myself feel better. and true enough i cant help feeling myself being the most stupid student in ACJC.

solution? slp .yeap feel much better.. and u will totally feel great again when u surrender all things to Him and give Him ur praise and thanksgiving.
haha.so i play my oragan like mad ... and yeah ! haha..thank God that He still loves me ...heheee.=) so im just put my trust in Him and just concentrate on my physics...haha

i truly thank God that He makes my flu go away. i prepared 3 packets of tissue today,after experiencing using 2 packet of tissue during chi paper yesterday... and i didn need to use any ! hahaha !amazing ya? haha ... God is good and faithful. =)

The battle has not started yet my physical health has already failed me, can I still keep my faith?

yox. yup. has been really busy preparing exam.everyday is like a rollar coaster to me . suddenly happy . suddenly stress. suddenly sad.haha .. after e conversation i decided to jot down some reflection during this period of time. =)

yup. no doubt this period is really really stressing .
i tot to myself. how come im feeling so stressed?
the most truthful ans: im scared of retaining. i have high possiblity of retaining after obtaining 3Fs in terms. haha. i scared how ppl think of me. i dun wana let ppl thinks im stupid or incapable.
therefore i begin to pressure myself..then of course got breakdown loh.
but i realli thank God for showering His grace and mercry to me.
He reminded me that hey where am i placing my confidence? in my results in my studies?
since i really doing my very best, always trying to maximise my time in studying the results i should raelli leave it in His hands who promised me that His plans are to prosper me.
perhaps i really retain , but i did my best. though to the world this may seems not a prosperity but hey His thought are far much greater than my thoughts. His plan definately works for a good purpose! =P

im so happy that I have this hope in me, which i really wana tell lots of ppl..when i see people stress and all that i really dunno how to encourage them , cux there's nothing to hope for..i can onli say just do ur best ... but for those who has the Hope in Him , when we do our best we can be assured that our results are safe in His hands.

one more thing to add, i always condem myself when i cant do the qn .. dermorilsing myself... i realise that im uniquely created by the very very wise and smart Creator ! so..i definately have the potentail to conqueor the qn !!! haha ... but CANNOT BE PROUD !remember..all these things does not come from me but from our Creator =D

well well..let's really learn to put our faith and trust in Him.I have tasted His goodness and faithfulness in this difficult times ... go !taste His goodness urself! =P

sitting infront of the comp.really unwilling to face what i had to study.ahhhhh.jiuming ah.
my chest has been pain since 7..and i really wonder why.now is 8.what if i studdenly get a heart attack .. ahh! that will be good! that means i will no need to face promo !
it's only tues ! and im on my verge of giving up?! how can !!! i wonder what i will be like at the end of this week...*sobx*
waha...bahhh bahh...i want a good health ! no headache. dun wana feeel feverish when i get panick... ahh..
haha..i think i continue to write like this my sept enties will be really sad ...so depressing to see the word STRESSED ..so let's read it this way ! DESSERTS !!! YUMMY :D:D:D
yar ! physics is a piece of cake ! coated with purple berries with creams ... maths is just a slice of mango mousse ! chinese ?! my ice-kachang ! hahaha... if i really eat all these i will really get terrible tummy ache ..the weathr is so cold ! haha..nice to sleep eh? but cannot !
ok let's get cracking ! dun be lazy people !!!

come do with me : BREATHE IN --- HOLD it !1 ...2....3....!! :D
BREATHE OUT !
again!do this three times ! feel cool? ok !

in these times of difficulties i will be obedient and leant to trust God for He will provide me with His strength ! ;P
"so do not fear,for I am with you;do not be dismayed,for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you;I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

yox.let's blog blog blog. to relieve stress ! haha...
im doing my tutorial on curve sketching..and im so impatient with drawing curves !! u must consider the curve tends to where and where .. ahyoi caculate until i blur!*-.-*

and i have been eating mooncakes ! i just cant imagine the amts of fats ! hahaha ...im gona lose my title of ms fit ! hahaa ! these year i got to eat a variety of mooncakes...haha..

1) my sis's future mother-in-law's 1st attempt of making mooncakes herself. and she can be really creative...bin pi + green tea + choc chip..and how it taste like ? ahem. shan't comment...but well..seems that im fuflling my sis responsiblity ..ate 6 out of 12 !!and she ? none !
2)haagen daz ice-cream mooncake..of course yummy..but is a bit too sweet...guess how much one haagen daz mooncake cost ? $20 !!! still got
3)various hotel mooncakes ...
4)yam mooncake..one of my favourties..and
5)my father's fav. hainan mooncake..and wu ren mooncake..which wat he like is what i dislike the most.. eeewww...
see! the amt of mooncakes i got to eat...= fats !! haha...ok dun get me wrong. im not on a diet.just that i have to eat healthily to prevent any more growth horizontally.haha =P

ok. let's move on to the next topic. which is what my father teased me about yesterday ->hooking a Jin Gui Xu ( a golden tortise husband!)
if he is serious about it im gona bang my head against the wall now!haha!
haha. let me delcare.why i never wana tok about the possiblities of a bgr relationship now.
1)im not mature enough to hold the responsibilites as a helper for my partner
2) no time to be committed. doing phy can take me 24 hrs. where got time for bf ?!!!
3)my age is very far away from the suitable marriage age !!
4) there are far too many more impt things that getting a bf !!!
5)...can't think liao ...but im sure these reasons are sufficient=P bleah.

what's the point of just getting a relationship after the another? sometimes is really sad to see my friends getting hurt over and over again. sad.
let me grow more mature first lah..use the time to really develop myself. =D
whuever see this dun ask me this qn ANYMORE! =P wahahahaha
let me at least be a nerd for now. go study ! =D=D=D

well. one more lesson that i learnt as this week come to an end that is : slow to anger!!
"for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires". James 1:20

this verse never speaks so strongly to me before.this shows that God is really all-knowing. He knows that i have been VERY short-tempered this week. well the week is coming to an end. since i confessed my sin. let is be the past and let's look forward to a good coming week !=P
let's move it ! i wana finish my maths ! =D
whuever feels that i spoke very harsh to .im sorry!

yox.yeah i know i just said i wun blog for a period of time. but i wana say it out! or else it will remain "undigested" in my mind. haha. i think so.
"huh.u come school for wat?"
"very stupid loh. come school for wat?"

let me explaine the background of this : i only got 1 period of PE lesson today out of 5 periods of lesson.because.JC1 lesson will ends at 11.10am today. and after that is 5-6hrs of long NE trip to OCS(officer cadate school).12 people turn up out of 26.some are going to take pink slip and zhao after their important lesson.

well. heard lots of such comments. no im not hurt or anything. just that i tot to myself. i really look that stupid meh? obviously not ! i know. well. is not a matter of stupid or not.it is a test of my faith.=)We always sing we want to live our life for Him and blab... but when decision comes , it is really tough. of course i really wish not to come school. but think again.what's my dentity?ans: daughter of the King of kings.my life belongs to who?who i wana live for?ans: The Almighty Father. therefore i have to be accountable of the time given to me. and coming to school is my responsibility as a student.

well. a test of my faith. no doubt. this decision i made.will defintely sharpens me.
so im happy person again !! =D=D=D
ok.my thought are digested.no constipation.wahahaha! =D

my blog is going to be lonely for a period of time ... wana load up pix but it will take me time .cant afford.
the past week has been terrible. I had been a bad time-keeper. Therefore this week...it cannot be !!! so ... i must be really conscious of how i spent my time !

Do pray for me that through this time of preparation of exam i will learnt to draw my strength from Him, stay focus but of course not to forget to continue to read His Word and do His work. =P

*to peeps who are having prelim : jiayou too ! =P

woah ! i have visitors who are coming to my blog! haha... =D im happy!hehee..hello ! all are welcome! haha ... my blog is not anyhow anyhow can see one loh ...cux i dun anyhow anyhow tell people one loh...haha! =D

well.. after a one week of junk food for my braekfast lunch and dinner!!! which are mostly high in sugar, salt, fats..they are oily fried and full of msg ... FINALLY ! i got to eat home food for today...finally!!! haha ... i have fish veggi and toufu .. with saba chilli .. home-made chilli..yummy! haha...the fish has no perservatives...simply washed with salt and steam...veggi .. is with little oil no salt ....toufu is fried at the outer skin onli ..the inner is still as white as before...yummy! i finally got a healthy meal ...haha ...! =D

well.it's nice to get to talk to zel and alo today over lunch and get to know them a bit more .. =P i hardly dine in with them ... =D well ...ohyar ! toking about the collection of our harp gown ...my mother was laughing like mad at me loh!!! haha..she say i simply dun have any figure in it..and im look really short in it ..!! ahh ! jiu ming ah! =P

yeah. pa is coming back home today..however some miscommunication ...two cars are went changi and wait for him ... that means one party is dissapointed and angry. and who kana? me loh.... ahyoi ..suppose to be happy that pa will be home today..what did he bring back leh? =P

>i only do 3 question of phy for the past few hours!!!
>> i don't wan to waste my holidays!!!
>>>ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!>.<

today 's air is really bad ... very bad .. serious air pollution .. i cant even stand to brethe in the air for a sec today .. everywhere is "burning" .. =(

i was tagged as ms fit today ... i have no idea where this idea come to her... which i wana delcare to her..im not fit!...hahahahahaha ... i just insulted my very ownself...haha....im just conscious of health without carrying it out...which is so bad lah....body combat on friday was no use at all i didn't even sweat...!!

let's slp ! then i will be pretty! hahaha...for tomolo performance by the youth! wohoooooo ..buai!

as i look at my blog. my english is still very bad! poor grammer poor vocab.poor sentence structure.everything is poor! ah! got to start reading my TIMES that are lying everywhere.hee!

today im so touched by a testimonial given by a mother not only about herself but a testimonial of her daughter and son too.

And also the daughter and her co-labourer shared about their mission trip in June to yun nan , once again reminded me the great commission.not that i dunno about the great commision ..but through it i see the weakness in me .there's 2 type of stuff . one for an eternal cause and one that is not. many times i placed importance and hold on to things that is so small compared to things that is for an eternal cause. for example , spending of my time. is it most of my time is not used wisely? when actually the time i can use it to do something that is more meaningful?

why sould i hold on to it since i koe i should give up and accpet the 'no' answer and placed my time on the more imporatnt stuffs that will last for an eternal cause?

and the bible did show the imporatnace of a family. the testimony showed the bond between the family memembers. they love each other with the love of our Father and i really think is a very admirable thing to actually grow together spiritually. isnt it nice to spend time and pray together with our family members?

i think the essence of a relationship ,no matter is family friends or a life-time parthner , is not just have fun together , but to help one another in the spiritual walk with Him " spur one another " encourage and speaks to one another in love .. growing up together spiritaully is a very beautiful thing... =)

did u watch superstar?! i think it is really nice . well. happy that weilian won . however i feel a pinch of sadness in me ... im wondering is it a good thing for him to step into showbix? well..is not for me to worry... hmm

anyway tried to change my blogskin ..i realise it took so much time decided to give up instead...haha..

tomolo is body combat! well time to burn my fats off! eating lots of junk recently..THAT'S BAD!!

happy teacher's day ! and happy birthday to my dear frend ah wen ! =D

*yawnx*
i always think if i just make sure that i eat vegetabes and fruits everyday , my health should be quite alright . ok plus excercise . i do excercise ok. =P twice a week?
but im wrong! true enough as what my father always nags about ... no materr how well is ur diet the most important factor to your health is your sleeping hours!
yeah...got headaches...doze off during class...urhg. seems that by just "ta-hanning" is cannot ..is harms my health... so ..to be wise...i better force myself to complete everything before 12-1230am.
let's move it! i wana finish my EoM! horrible! doing it for the third time!

-lonely without daddy-
no one to make me milo every morning
no one to help me spread my bread with nutella and snow cream
no one there to ensure my saftey by watching me walk to the mrt ...and lots more..

it's funny to see mummy trying to play the role of my dad ... they are just two completely different people. haha. what happens if one day.........

yox! i wanna make some noise here ..my blog has been rather lonely .. that's cause im lazy ... i does have my weird thoughts lingering around .. but haha ..yup.lazy =P

im searching for new blogskins...saw some nice one .. shall change soon .. =P

well what's my thought for today??
hm. just wanna say woman wanna be feel very blessed.haha.
suddenly i realise there are so many people are willing to help me!
maybe is not suddenly.hm.and i realise there are many people who can help me in my physics.
what can i say? Jehovah Jireh, always providing my needs. =)

therefore HEY EVERYONE! just wanna say a simple THANK YOU !! i think everyone who i come to know has helped me one way of another!=D=D=D

woosh! wah!>.<
i observed somthing recently too ..
the person u care and love deeply can make u turn to a monster...i mean a crazy monster ..haha
i observed how my dear sis turned crazy because of diff people ... woah.now i know it is powerful

tell u a secret .. i dozed off for a few sec during chapel ! my goodness..that makes my guilty =S
well..seek for forgiveness!ok time to sleep!

> trying to squeeze every single drop of brain juice everyday .. so that it can work more and more efficently as the days go by...=P

>>u cant place ur emotion needs or ur security in man , cause man will definately fail u.yet it is so hard to not to tend to do it.well.it is not something that u can conquer by yourself.rather with God's help.acknowledge it.then continue to surrender ur life unto Him.=)

song that we sang today that i cannot not agree:

Chorus:
how could i live without you
how could i survive without your love
without your touch
you are the one that heals me and cleanes my heart
and set me free.

truly without Him , i dunno how can i survive through my darkest moments? without the love of Him that He has shown by sending His only son to die for me,how can my sin be cleansed nor can i be set free? His truth has set me free.=)

haha .. let me note down my currect greatest achievement that is ..... i finally opened my mouth and book a date down to meet my phy teacher ! (opps! i suppose to ban the word!) hehee.... finally..u shld had seen me beaming with joy and hop a little while walking out sch...haha..i hope no one noticed...haha...it takes super big courage for me to take that step..waha !

u koe wat? i think cool breeze is so nice...especially the breeze after a rain ... when u take a deep breathe is smell sweet and refreshing .. i like that kind of weather best ! =D just sit somehwere in a corner...drink a cup of ...hmm...coffee? stare at the sky .. look at the moving clouds ... read a little .. i think i will feel very contended le. =)

soon ? such days will come? hehee...

my___ practical is still undone.

hello.. have not been posting any entries lately ... i do have weird tots in mind wanted to post up ... but haaha...but im just too tired and lazy ..i think sleep definately has a much higher piority than blog..haha

i don't feel good today..didn't have a good sleep yesterday..my mind was pratically awake just that my eyelids are close ... throat is still very itchy which im scared that it will turn into running nose and finally leads to fever ... i seriously dun want to fall sick .. that's why im feeding myself with lots of fruits...=P and i was quite annoyed during chapel .. by people's comments .. i feel like just scolding them lah..but ... haha... i have no right too ...hehee...

i wonder why people like to say vulgarities? is it really something cool? something in?fasionable? i really can stand people saying the 4 letter words like no one business ... i feel like yelling at them!

haha..my entry sounds mad today ...haha...ok..i better calm down and step aback ...breathe in breathe out...1..2..3.!smile! haha..=D

u only gona live everyday once u koe ... haha..i find it really hard to live everyday for God's glory...just the controlling of emotions alone ...kills me...haha..

today i received a BIG D ..not initial D movie tix or vcd...haha...is a comment that marks : POOR SKILL D ...wahahaha...tomolo is phy prac !!! i seriously dunno how to comment and annalyse on errors loh...haha..

let me share with u a nice song sent by the woo, (waha u better tell me what's ur blog add!)
Who am I
Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my nameWould care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning StarWould choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You're

Chorus:I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours
I am Yours

yar..who am i men..that the Lord of all the heavens and earth will want to shower His love and grace each day for me? what rights do i have to argue and be stubborn ... be submissive!=D I belongs to Him , He will be my shield, help me counter all the attacks..i shall fear nothing!wahaa...do u have such a powerful weapon in ur life? ;)

it is great to be on par with time =D
it is bad to be behind of time =(
why am i always chasing after time?
why time just cant be on my side?

ah! man is small man is limited.just too bad.face it.
ah! but that's not the excuse.
to continue to be accountable for the time u spent. bleah =P

all sorts of things are pilling up higher and higher
it seems like it gona crash down on me any moment ..
but let me not stop running .. continue to perserver..

I know He is with me , He has continuously letting me to taste His goodness!
sustaining me through...=)

i only hope that what i have on hand can be truly accounted for...

"Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness , and all these things will be added unto you"

tired? feel like giving up too ? don't k ... cause u are not alone facing such situation ...moreoever we got a BIG GOD above ! =D

hello..just sat formy physics test...yar i was panic ..very...that it takes about half of the duration tof the paper for me to cool down..that's alot...ok..didn complete the paper as usual .. and .. im not very optimistic about passing this test ...

haha..i realise something i had been talking about physics all day ! hello! that's not the way loh...my life is not about physics!! aha..im gona ban myself from talking about physics ...

let's talk about holistic eduacation ...haha ..acutally im thankful that im exposed to all sorts of area in ac..yar...spors music and accademic ... stretched ..truly..=P ok that is quite out of point ...

i love fridays ...helps me to catch my breathe .. =P anyway yar...everyone is talking about promos ...haha 6-8 weeks more?

i like today devotion too ...he shared about this big big banner that write"God is on our side whom shall we be afraid ?"

step back and think again if two methodist school happens to compete with each other and each put up this banner as a moral support for their own school....does that maen that God will stand only at one side of the people ...

but God is constant how is it possible for him to be bias? so he ended with we should say "we are on God's side ( standing firm at his side of righteouness) whom shall i be afriad?"

=P being educated in a methodist school ...somethimes we use versse without much thinking and it become misused...so i must be really careful in what i say..=) make sure what i say has depth and meaning..boohoohooo! =D

ok... i feel rather guilty of screaming at my sis just now .. didn't control my anger well enough..was trying to crack my head on that phy Qn and she just provoke me at really a wrong time ...well....hmm..

physics has a detrimental efffect on me ? haha .. well... a scoope ice-cream did cheer me up instantly...waha...the invention of ice-cream is brilliant! haha =P

yup going back school tomorrow ....i guess everyone hopes that holidays will be even longer right?

I think now the greatest challenge for me is to really discipline myself and use my extra free periods wisely ... not just stoning around in sch..

haha...guess what i succeded in not giving in to snacks today !!! what an accomplishment ..the night is young time to sleep ..then tomolo can wohooohooo...in school!!=P

hey mr physics...im gona win you over !! >.<

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
quite a familiar verse ya? but God's Word is always relevent , it stills minister to me. =D

yox is anyone missing my blog entries? aha ... i rather miss the leisure of typing in entries .. seriously is hard for me to blog .. cause once im online i will talk non stop by the time i know it will be late midnight ... ahaha .. so therefor i concluded i have been guai recently..=P

actually not very true .. my "hobby" now is sleeping .... but cant sleep now cause the ice mocha is too effective ... haha..but i appreciated that cup of ice mocha..!!=D and i have lots of indigested food ... cux i ate my dinner at 12am! imust say is supper...haha ..

i enjoyed today ... national day ...my first time of spending it with the woo and her friend d ?haha ..i dunno how to spell her name...paisae! ran and ran... just to catch the glimpse of the fireworks ...haha...ohwell ...yar..we did but not the full view is blocked by that "durian" =P i enjoyed the best part of the day is really just sat at the cafe with them ..and at the skygarden playing guitar and singing songs that praise our Father in Heaven... so nice and peaceful ... haha ...how i wish A level end faster and i can get more leisure time ...haha .. yeah .. i miss the time of playing guitar and singing with my dear friends ...is really nice when u and your small group of friends gather together and worship ...=D

it is funny to see the woo learnt her chinese ... haha ...and yeah ! finally someone stands at the same side as me! haha.. how happy i am ! heheee ...

today i participated the Family Day organised by my church... as i reflect i wonder had i done my part? haix ... feels a bit guilty ...=S

watched Charlie with ac gang of friends yesterday...hmm..is rather disappointing to me .. but hmm..well ..its audience more for a whole family kind ? therefore it must accomodate ?

wat else ? haha ...im rather disorganise .. cant have proper thoughts .. but hmm...well ..today is a an enjoyable day...things are doing fine for me i guess ... just that phy test is coming up on friday ..gona tear my hair off soon...hahaha ...=P one more day left for me to study ...goodnight people.Zzzzz....

Our faithful God's plan and timing is perfect. =)

i stinks ! yet i cant bathe ... bathrooms are not available...im deprived of sleep!!! hahaha ... but anyway i went to a good concert just now with my dad..i think that is the first time that i actually went to such a concert with my dad.

It is a percussion ensemble ... surprsingly my dad enjoyed it ... it is done by Singapore Chinese Orchestra with 3 other percussion bands from Korea China and Europe. Actually chinese orchestra are not that "dull or old-fashion" . They sound really cool today and the audience participation brought the performance to the climax . AH! make me feel like joining CO again..hahaa..im so horrible ..jack of all trades ... so greedy ..wanna learnt everything ...

my eyes are really getting smaller and smaller ...im still waiting!!!! i wana bathe i wana sleep! i wana protest! ohno ...im talking rubbish again ... =P

does anyone buy lottery ?! i got a stack of surveys awaiting !!! who wana help me?!

*yawnx* real tired .................... looking forward to holidays but yet not looking forward ...........
haha ... stresses are piling up again !!!

firstly demoralised...... when practising harp today seriously i cannot make it ..i keep on panic and cannot play the right note...and there's only me and alo ..so is unlike in band ...others blasing sound can cover ur awful playing...so what im playing is gona be obvious..ahhh....scared! monday is the perofrmance yet i still play so unsteady...

secondly, im seriously learning physcics very slowly...i have been telling my tutor i will ask him question but im still not prepared to ask ! He's too nice and too patient towards me until im so mad to myself that why am i so slow in understanding that he has to wait for me to ask him qn..he say i must know what i dunno...but there's here and there i dunno ..yet here and there i know ...how to compile everytthing and ask?

thirdly , they showed us our cohord performance in maths..ok im at the very far end of the sea .. which they call i have yet to reach the "shore"...haha...more chapters coming up ...2D trigo..vectors...more graphs...maths induction...wopps...need practice..thx abi for telling me her study tips...i think it helps...=P so im gona start doing at least 2-3qn of maths everyday..then wun pile up the tutorials...

haha....okie hope it didn demoralise u about studying..actually studying in really nice ... im serious ...just that mastering it is difficult...
*stresses attack* haha...so hide where?!!! evacuate !!!!hurry! haha..ok lame ..
but yup ... today's devotion was "trust in the Lord with all your heart and all your mind and all your soul,and He will make ur paths straight"
is so easy to depend on your own strength in the end u wear urself out...there's only one place that we can run to that is under the shadow of the Almighty ... where we can renew our strength from and continue to run the race...blab blab blab...i feel like running too...oo..tomorrow is body combat ! hahaha..yeah ! more fats can be burnt off...haha ..
anyway let's not give up...studying is fun wat! right?!=P

key phrase for me this week :

to complete the portion that God has assigned to me ...

hard!tough!but practise strict self-discipline ... get strengthned through prayers ... then..i will receive the complete joy! =D